8 Reasons You Always Get Hit On More When You’re In A Relationship

It feels like whenever I’m in a relationship, I get hit on and asked out more often than I ever do when I’m single. My friends seem to have a similar experience and while I initially thought it was weird, it actually makes a lot of sense. Here’s why you’re such a hot commodity when you’re already taken.

  1. Guys are more attracted to the vibe you put out when you’re in a relationship. When you’re already in a relationship, you’re not expecting anything from any guys you meet and therefore you come off as confident and cool rather than desperate. Sometimes when we’re looking for a potential partner, we overanalyze our actions and edit what we say and how we say it in order to be more agreeable. When you already have a guy, you’re more likely to be yourself without trying to impress any other guys, which is an undeniably attractive quality.
  2. It’s human nature to want what you can’t have. When a guy knows you’re in a relationship, he might be more likely to hit on you than when you’re single because you appear to be unattainable and he wants an ego boost. If he’s successful in getting your attention, his confidence will skyrocket because he knows that someone with a boyfriend will be a harder conquest than someone who is single. Maybe the reason guys hit on you more often when you’re in a relationship is that they like the challenge.
  3. Genuine happiness radiates. Positivity is definitely an attractive trait, and if you love your relationship, it’ll come through in your interactions and conversations. People are typically more interested in dating someone who’s happy and positive, so if you come across that way to guys, that’s definitely a reason you’re getting hit on more often. Also, a guy might think that because your personality is upbeat and sunny, a relationship with you would be as well.
  4. You don’t play hard to get, you are hard to get. Seeming like you’re hard to get, whether it’s because you’re in a relationship, you have high standards, or you’re just good at acting like you are hard to get, increases the chances that a guy will ask you out. Guys love a challenge and there’s nothing more satisfying to them than being successful when asking out a girl who seems elusive. Also, if a guy can tell that you’re faking being hard to get, it will be an immediate turn-off, so the fact that you are unattainable will make men that much more interested in you.
  5. You most likely have more self-confidence. In a healthy relationship, your partner will make you feel more confident in yourself. The fact that you feel better about yourself when you’re coupled up than when you’re single is a definite reason why you might also be getting asked out more often. Confidence is attractive!
  6. You seem less intimidating. When you’re in a relationship, you automatically view any guys that you interact with as friends, therefore acting casual and friendly when you’re around them. Your friendly vibe and conversation is an explanation for why you might suddenly be someone guys can’t get enough of.
  7. You’re not actively seeking a relationship when you’re already in one. It seems like when you’re actively looking for anything, it automatically becomes harder to find. When you’re not stressing finding a boyfriend and getting into a relationship, guys will be more interested in you because you have no agenda and seem more relaxed. You’re more likely to get asked out when you’re not being overbearing and on the hunt for a boyfriend.
  8. Your attitude towards men and life in general may have changed. When you’re in a relationship, you might have a more positive opinion on men than you did when you were single. You’re also less likely to come off as high maintenance and hard to please when you’re in a relationship because your attitude towards any men you meet becomes more laid-back and unattached. You don’t try to be anything you’re not because you don’t really care if any other guys want to date you, which is likely a reason they ask you out more.
Kerry is a freelance writer from Boston, Massachusetts who now lives in the Sunshine State with the love of her life and her 15 month old daughter. She writes frequently about her personal experiences (find more of her work on www.followmetogetlost.wordpress.com). She has an Etsy shop with cute items: https://www.etsy.com/shop/FollowMeToGetLostWhen she's not writing, she loves to spend time outside, at the beach, and with her family.