We waste considerable time and energy searching for the idea of a “soulmate” or “The One” to spend the rest of our days with. However, have you ever considered the possibility that your one life-changing person might just be you?
Life’s successes are subjective. There’s a misconception of what it means to be successful in life. We’re constantly told that “all you need is love” (thanks, The Beatles) so we feel like if we’re not in a romantic relationship, we’re somehow failing. However, this couldn’t be further than the truth. It’s up to you to decide what’s considered successful. Don’t let yourself be pressured into living the life society tells you that you should have. Live for yourself.
Newsflash: there’s no such thing as the perfect partner. Nobody’s perfect. We’re all human beings, we all have flaws, and we all have things that we’d like to change about ourselves. If you try to spend the rest of your days searching for a flawless human, I’m afraid you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. That person doesn’t exist.
You don’t need a romantic relationship to make your life complete. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need a spouse, fiance, or partner to make life worthwhile. Heck, you don’t even need a date. There are other joys to be found in life other than the joy of being in a romantic relationship. I mean, just look around at the amazing world we live in!
Sometimes the only person you can rely on is yourself. Because we’re all imperfect, sometimes we let each other down in life. You could think that you’re in a super happy romantic relationship one minute, full of love, only for your other half to turn around the next day and tell you that they feel like the spark has died and they’re leaving you for someone else. It’s true what they say: you have to look after number one in life, and then the rest of your priorities should naturally fall into place.
The relationship that you have with yourself is the one that lasts a lifetime. Therefore, it’s imperative to make sure it’s a good one. Instead of always being on the lookout for new people to bring you sunshine, find ways to bring sunshine to your life yourself. Whether this is through a career change, hours of self-care, or fulfilling a life-long dream to travel the world, look after yourself and focus on your wants and wishes first and foremost.
You’re capable of amazing things. Look at how far our species has come and how much we’ve achieved in the short time that we’ve been on this planet. Human beings are capable of so much, so never doubt yourself for a minute. Go after the impossible, chase your dreams, and live a life of no regrets.
Constantly focusing on another person will eventually destroy you. Hey, I’ve been there. If you make someone your everything, you end up accidentally giving them the power to break you into a thousand pieces. And they do. And it sucks. However, if you always keep a little bit of that power back for yourself, then you’ll never reach rock bottom and it becomes easier to crawl out of a black hole.
You are enough. Really. Just in case you haven’t realized it yet, you don’t need anyone else to make you who you are. You’re awesome as-s. You’re strong and independent and you can take on the world. Don’t ever let anyone else make you feel or think differently. Your identity is everything, otherwise all humans would be the same—and where’s the fun in that?
Ask yourself why you’re always on the lookout. If you’re always searching for a romantic partner, ask yourself why this is. Are you insecure? Are you lonely? Are you trying to fill a void within yourself? Either way, another person is never going to fix you. You need to learn how to fix yourself. If you stop looking for people to help you, you actually end up helping yourself more. It sounds backward but it actually works.
Relying on other people to make you happy all the time isn’t healthy. You know what is healthy? Learning how to make yourself happy. That way, if anything ever goes wrong, you’ve always got yourself to fall back on. Smart, right?
You have so much more life yet to live. In summary, don’t waste your days looking for a romantic partner to positively change your life. Instead, change your life yourself. Do you. Be you, for you—and don’t waste a second, because life is fleeting and it’ll be over before we all know it.
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