I Have Sex On The First Date To Weed Out Guys Who’d Think Less Of Me Because Of It

Here’s the deal: if I like a guy, I’m not necessarily going to wait for the third date before sleeping with him. If the guy loses respect for me because of it then he was never right for me in the first place. Don’t let the door hit ya!

  1. There’s nothing wrong with having sex as long as I’m ready. Why play games if you like someone? I enjoy sex, so if I meet someone I like and we hit it off, I’m not going to play hard to get for the sake of it. Does this make me less of a person? Less of a prude, really. I’m a great believer in only having sex when you feel ready. For some people, this means waiting for a while, for others, it means not having to wait at all.
  2. I don’t want to waste time with someone I’m not sexually compatible with. Also, sex usually gets better with time. When you just meet someone, you’re not likely to have the most amazing sex with that person. I mean, it can be pretty amazing, but the more you get to know each other, the better it will get. My advice? Start early. If someone is totally wrong for you, you will know straight away. If they have potential, you can keep sleeping with them and see how things go.
  3. I’m not a cow and I’m not looking for someone who’d “buy” me. Remember that awful saying? “Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?”Is there anything more disrespectful to women than comparing them to cows that can be bought or sold based on some sort of perceived virtue? Anyone who thinks of me as some sort of human chattel is not worth even the slightest bit of my time. I’m a human being with needs and I’m not going to be shamed for it.
  4. Men who have a problem with female sexuality are of no interest to me. I own my sexuality and I expect guys to appreciate it, not be intimidated by it. I’m not interested in dating anyone insecure enough to be put off by the fact that sleeping with people as a big part of my love life.
  5. Sex is just something I do; if he makes a big deal out of it, we’re just too different. I’ll admit it, I hate the term “making love.” Sure, sex can be an expression of love, which is great, but it can also be an expression of a lot of other things. I don’t see it as something that should be reserved only for that one special person. If I meet someone who feels differently, then I know we won’t work out.
  6. If I meet someone I like and want to have sex with him, I will. Deal with it. I don’t need too many bells and whistles around it and I don’t want to be tied down to a person who thinks we have to get married just because we went to bed together. A chilled attitude about sex is a must for every relationship I’m in.
  7. I watch carefully—if a guy disrespects me because he thinks I’m “easy,” I’m out. It’s easy enough to see how a guy feels about sex on a first date. Does he actively try to make it happen? Does he seem horrified by the concept? Once you’ve slept together, is he still respectful or does he start treating you differently? Until you get better at avoiding the wrong guys in advance, you’re going to be learning a lot of hard lessons. I’ve been both pleasantly and unpleasantly surprised in the past. But really, it’s so much better to find out early than to drag out a relationship with the wrong person.
  8. Some of my best relationships were with guys I slept with on the first date. Why? Because a guy who doesn’t make a big deal out of it is obviously more open-minded, emotionally mature and chilled. Anything else is a waste of time.
  9. We’re in the 21st century, last I checked. If a woman wants to have sex on the first date, just go with it. Men do too. I can’t be dealing with guys who only get turned on when a woman rejects them for a bit. Guys who are that easily manipulated are not very interesting to me.
  10. Guys who push you into sleeping with them and then shame you when you do? No thanks. I’ve had that happen too many times. You’re apparently meant to reject their advances to make them stay interested, which doesn’t stop them from constantly trying to push you into sex. Dude, if you want it so much, go for it. It’s no biggie.
Writer, artist, intrepid traveler and lover of cats, cheese and techno music. Preferably not all at the same time.
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