Charismatic people always seem to get ahead in life — they know how to talk to anyone and everyone and always manage to work their way out of sticky situations. That being said, even though charisma attracts people, it also seems to push people away at times, especially when they’re dealing with their own insecurities. Here are 15 signs you have a charismatic personality that a lot of people are intimidated by.
1. People seem to feel threatened by your confidence.
It can be hard being the sibling, friend, or even partner of a seemingly preternaturally talented and likable person. They may feel like you get all the attention and it leaves very little space for other people to get any credit for their talents. You’re not trying to hog the spotlight — it’s not your fault you’re doing well in life! Sadly, people can be intimidated when they fear that there isn’t enough attention to go around.
2. People are often jealous of you.
Charismatic people bring out the best and worst in other people. On one hand, you demand respect and admiration for your confident demeanor. However, you can also bring jealous feelings out of people who wish they were similarly outgoing. This feeling of resentment follows charismatic people like a shadow — and worst of all, you’re probably not even aware of it.
3. You’re often clueless about your effect on people.
Have you ever wondered why people sometimes stop talking when you walk into a room? Or, when you move to a new place and post about it on Instagram, everyone flocks to you? You may not notice it, but people around you are really drawn to your personality. However, the people who don’t follow you may be suspicious of your effect on other people – but that’s their problem, not yours.
4. Your Prince Charming persona is effortless.
There’s a delicate line between charismatic charm and slimy people-pleaser, and you always strike the right balance. It comes naturally to you! However, other insecure people who don’t have your level of confidence tend to get intimidated by how easily you do this. They have work to do on themselves, though — not you.
5. You always get told you’re “too good to be true.”
This can be hurtful to charismatic people because people are accusing you of performing your charming personality, which isn’t the case at all. When people say you’re too good to be true, they tend to be put off from digging any deeper into your personality because they think they know you. But all they can see is the surface, and it can be lonely sometimes.
6. People accuse you of insincerity.
When you go about your life trying new things and getting involved in new hobbies, your open mind and willingness to fail always attracts plaudits from your friends. We love that about ourselves! However, sometimes it attracts resentment from other people who would choose to pull people down rather than raise them up.
7. People are suspicious of you.
It can be really frustrating when you’re trying to lift people up and spread a confident, positive demeanor. Know in yourself that you’re talented and hardworking. If negative people try to act as if things get handed to you on a plate, remind them how hard you have to work to get where you are. Stick to your guns and don’t let negativity win. You’ve earned all that you get.
8. People want to use you for status.
The best thing about being charismatic is often its greatest shortfall — people like you. However, with that comes a lot of pressure, and people will use you. They want to get where you’ve got to, whether it be in the workplace or in your relationships. Be wary of people who hang on your coattails because they’re fake friends who are trying to get up the social ladder.
9. You get a reputation for being a social climber.
You’re at your most comfortable when socializing — you’re an extrovert and thrive off friendships and romantic relationships. However, while you’re living your best life and exploring lots of forms of socializing, some will view that as a lack of commitment and claim that you’re spreading yourself so thin because you’re trying to milk whatever you can from people. Saying that you use people is the furthest thing from the truth, and you know this because hanging out with people is your favorite activity.
10. You’re sometimes branded as a careless person.
Charisma seems to be the poisoned chalice that everyone thinks they want, but as soon as they take a sip, they’re intimidated. You have come to realize that you attract attention just by being yourself, but it’s exhausting trying to manage everyone’s negative perceptions. You know it’s their jealousy driving them and that you’re a loyal friend. Don’t doubt yourself.
11. People always want to make plans with you but often flake out last minute.
You always have the best recommendations for activities. Whether it be bar spots, running routes, coffee dates, or street food – you’ve got a notes app list with places to try. Your list of things to try is always growing, just as the list of people who want to hang out with you! However, knowing how experienced and free-spirited you are often gets to them and they often end up flaking out before you can hang out.
12. You have to be firm with your free time.
If you had your own way, you’d book out every minute of your day. However, you also know that you can’t sustain that, and have to force yourself to take a break. This means you have to communicate clearly and firmly with people who are clamoring to be around you. Remember that you don’t owe people your time — and sometimes they’ll be hurt when you have to say “no” to a hangout. Trust that you’re doing it for the right reasons.
13. People tell you to “tone it down” sometimes.
You’ll be able to tell that your vivacious personality has intimidated other people when they try to put you in a box. This can be challenging because you worked hard to hone your talents, hobbies, and interests. Don’t listen to them — keep being you. You don’t need to dull your shine for anyone, no matter how affronted other people feel about it. That’s their issue, not yours.
14. You get really invested in every conversation.
One of the best things about your charisma is how passionate you can be with your friends. It will, however, mean that you get a reputation for being so invested in a conversation that you interrupt a lot or inadvertently center yourself in it. Just remember to draw breath and let other people talk now and then, otherwise, they’ll get annoyed!