Signs You’re An Alpha Female & People Find You Intimidating

Alpha females are amazing.

The funny thing about alpha females is that they never describe themselves that way. Their presence is always memorable and noteworthy, but they’re not the loudest voices in the room because they don’t need to be — their actions speak for themselves. They’re strong, powerful, self-assured, and totally killing it in life in the best possible way. Could this be you? Here’s how you know for sure.

1. You’re confident and comfortable in your own skin.

redhead woman out running looking determined

One of the first signs that you’re an alpha female is your unwavering confidence. You’re comfortable in your own skin and radiate self-assuredness. You don’t need validation from others to feel good about yourself because you already know your worth. This confidence is incredibly attractive, but it can also be intimidating for those who aren’t secure in themselves. Some men might find it challenging to approach you because they feel they need to match your level of self-confidence.

2. Independence is your middle name.

Space, computer and portrait of woman in office at night, working and research idea with mockup screen. Mock up, happy and businesswoman search online for creative design, inspiration and ppt review

You’re fiercely independent and thrive on self-reliance. You’re more than capable of taking care of yourself and don’t rely on anyone to save the day. While this independence is an admirable quality, it can be intimidating for men who might wonder where they fit into your life. They may fear that you won’t need or want them, making it essential to find someone who appreciates and supports your independence.

3. You value honesty above all else.

smiling woman with arms crossed on rooftop

Even if what someone has to say is hurtful or upsetting,  you’d much rather be told the truth than be lied to in order to spare your feelings. You’re a big girl and know how to take tough news. You respect people much more when they can own up to reality than when they sugarcoat everything. (And if you keep running into guys who don’t do this, head over to our sister site, Sweetn. They have some great advice and tips to change your love life for the better in some game-changing ways!)

4. You’re anything but a follower.

Alpha females often find themselves in leadership roles. Whether it’s at work, in social circles, or within their families, they’re natural leaders. You take initiative, make decisions confidently, and don’t shy away from responsibilities. While this trait is commendable, it might make some men feel like they’re in competition with you. Finding a partner who respects and values your leadership qualities is key.

5. You don’t hesitate to speak your mind.

You’re not one to sugarcoat your thoughts or feelings. You speak your mind honestly and directly, which can be both refreshing and intimidating. Some men might find it challenging to handle your straightforwardness, especially if they’re used to more passive communication styles. But, in the long run, those who appreciate your candor will value your open and honest approach to communication.

6. You know what you want out of life and will stop at nothing to get it.

As an alpha female, you’re driven by your goals and ambitions. You’re constantly striving to improve yourself and your life. This determination is inspiring, but it can also be intimidating to those who may feel like they need to keep up with your relentless pursuit of success. It’s essential to find a partner who shares your drive and supports your aspirations.

7. Anything you need, you can give yourself.

Your self-reliance is rock-solid. You’re the kind of person who can handle any situation that comes your way, from changing a flat tire to tackling a challenging project at work. While this independence is admirable, it might make some men hesitate to offer their assistance, fearing they might be seen as unnecessary. It’s important to strike a balance between your self-sufficiency and allowing others to contribute when they genuinely want to.

8. You face challenges head-on with excitement rather than fear.

Alpha females are fearless when it comes to taking on challenges. You’re not afraid to step out of your comfort zone and confront obstacles head-on. This fearless attitude can be intimidating to men who might be more risk-averse or hesitant about change. They might feel overwhelmed by your fearlessness, but they can also learn from your ability to embrace new experiences.

9. You have strong beliefs and you stand up for them.

You have strong beliefs, and you’re not afraid to stand up for what you think is right. Whether it’s advocating for a cause you’re passionate about or defending your principles, you’re vocal and unwavering. This level of conviction can be intimidating for those who are less assertive in expressing their own beliefs. Finding someone who respects your values and is open to healthy debates can lead to fulfilling conversations and connections.

10. You’re a natural problem-solver.

Alpha females excel at problem-solving. You approach challenges with a practical mindset, seeking solutions rather than dwelling on problems. While this problem-solving prowess is impressive, it can make some men feel like they need to match your analytical thinking. It’s essential to find someone who appreciates your ability to navigate life’s complexities and sees it as an asset to the relationship.

11. You know how to embrace your vulnerable side.

While you exude strength and confidence, you’re also willing to embrace vulnerability. You understand that showing vulnerability is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your authenticity. Some men may find this balance between strength and vulnerability intriguing but intimidating because it requires them to open up emotionally as well. Building trust and creating a safe space for emotional connection is key when dealing with such situations.

12. You’re relentlessly determined and know how to persevere.

You approach challenges with an unwavering determination to succeed. Your tenacity is admirable, but it can be intimidating for those who might struggle to match your level of commitment and persistence. Some men may fear they won’t be able to keep up with your drive, so it’s crucial to find someone who respects your ambition and supports your goals.

13. You have a strong sense of boundaries.

Alpha females are clear about their boundaries and don’t hesitate to assert them. You know what you’re comfortable with and won’t compromise on your principles. This assertiveness can be unsettling for individuals who are used to bending their boundaries or for those who may have ulterior motives. Finding someone who respects your boundaries is essential for a healthy connection.

14. You’re full of charisma and magnetism.

Your charisma and magnetic personality draw people towards you. You effortlessly command attention when you walk into a room. This captivating presence can be intimidating for some men who may worry about standing out in your shadow. It’s vital to find a partner who appreciates your charisma and feels secure in their own identity.

15. You know how and when to speak up.

You’re unafraid to engage in challenging conversations and speak up when necessary. Your direct communication style ensures that nothing remains unsaid. While this honesty is a virtue, it can make some men uncomfortable, especially if they’re not used to such straightforwardness. Finding someone who values open communication and is receptive to your honesty is key.

16. You recognize the importance of self-care.

Alpha females understand the importance of self-care and prioritize their well-being. You maintain a balanced lifestyle, which can be a source of inspiration for others. However, this self-awareness and commitment to self-care might intimidate men who aren’t as attuned to their own needs. It’s essential to find someone who shares your appreciation for self-care and can also benefit from your wisdom in this regard.

17. You have an unyielding sense of resilience.

You possess remarkable resilience in the face of adversity. No matter what challenges life throws your way, you bounce back stronger and more determined. This resilience can be intimidating for those who might struggle to cope with setbacks or view you as unshakeable. Some individuals may worry about measuring up to your ability to overcome obstacles. Finding a partner who admires your resilience and is willing to learn from your experiences can lead to a strong and supportive relationship.

18. You’re unapologetically yourself whether other people like it or not.

You’re not afraid to be different, and you value honesty and authenticity in your interactions. While this unwavering commitment to being genuine is admirable, it can be intimidating for those who are accustomed to more superficial or conformist social dynamics. Some individuals may feel challenged to confront their own authenticity when they encounter someone as real as you. Finding someone who appreciates and celebrates your unique qualities can lead to a deeper and more meaningful connection.

19. You can be ruthless in your decision-making.

This isn’t to be confused with being cruel or unfeeling. In reality, you recognize when something isn’t right or is outright toxic and you have no problem cutting it out of your life without a second thought. You recognize that it might be hurtful for other people or you might be seen as cut-throat, but you don’t walk around with dead weight weighing you down.

20. You don’t put up with other people’s BS.

You know how to read people well, and when you sense that someone is being dishonest or has less than honorable intentions, you’re happy to call it out. You don’t suffer fools gladly and you’re certainly not a doormat. If other people think they can manipulate you, they have another thing coming.

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Phoebe Mertens is a writer, speaker, and strategist who has helped dozens of female-founded and led companies reach success in areas such a finance, tech, science, and fashion. Her keen eye for detail and her innovative approach to modern womanhood makes her one of the most sought-out in her industry, and there's nothing she loves more than to see these companies shine.

With an MBA from NYU's Stern School of Business and features in Forbes and Fast Company she Phoebe has proven she knows her stuff. While she doesn't use social media, she does have a private Instagram just to look at pictures of cats.
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