Sure, the person you’re dating/”hanging out” with/”talking to”/whatever says they like you, but how do you know if someone is truly interested in you on more than just surface-level? While asking them outright and trusting that you’ll get an honest answer is probably the best course of action, you can also tell by looking for these signs.
1. They Maintain Eye Contact.
It can feel really awkward to look someone in the eye, especially for an extended period of time, which is why if someone does this, it’s a good sign they’re genuinely interested in you. They want to make it clear that they’re paying attention to what you have to say and want you to know they’re present and engaged. It can be a bit uncomfortable if you’re not used to this kind of attentiveness, but it’s also pretty hot, if you think about it.
2. They Ask Follow-Up Questions.
Someone who isn’t really feeling things with you will let you tell a story and leave it at that. On the flip side, someone who’s intrigued to know more will ask questions so they can find out. They want further details because they know this is a surefire way to get to know you better and figure out what makes you tick. If they weren’t genuinely interested in you, they wouldn’t bother.
3. They Lean In and Face You.
Body language can speak volumes in a conversation. When someone leans in and faces you directly, they’re physically expressing how they’re feeling inside, which is usually “attracted to you.” They’re trying to create a more intimate environment, using the ability to get closer to you in every possible way. If you happen to be hanging out in a place with a lot of background noise, don’t be surprised if they take advantage of that and use it as an excuse to move a bit nearer.
4. They Nod at what you’re saying to show they understand.
When you’re telling a story about the pet turtle you had as a kid, someone who’s genuinely interested in you is going to nod along, showing that they’re listening and understanding the importance of the story you’re telling. They’re engaged, enthralled, and want you to feel heard, so they nod every once in a while or even give some kind of verbal cue that they’re following. If they didn’t care, they would just sort of zone out and let you waffle on.
5. They Remember Details from Previous Conversations.
This is probably one of the most obvious signs that someone is genuinely interested in you. If they weren’t, the things you tell them would go in one ear and out the other. Instead, they commit even the smallest facts and details to memory, using them in future conversations or even to make future gestures like picking you up coffee, grabbing your favorite snack from the shop, or even surprising you with tickets to see your favorite band.
6. They Share Personal Stories and Vulnerabilities.
These days, I feel like more people are guarded than not, so if someone actually wants to open up and let you in on the tenderest parts of themselves, they’re obviously genuinely interested in you. They feel safe enough to share their vulnerabilities with you and trust that you won’t use those things against them. It’s a way of building a deeper, more meaningful connection — make sure you offer them the same in return if you feel comfortable enough.
7. They Offer Encouragement and Support.
Again, people have their own stuff going on in life, so if someone goes out of their way to be invested in your stuff and act as your biggest cheerleader, they’re clearly genuinely interested in you. They want you to know they recognize your potential and believe that you can do anything you put your mind to. They’re also there whenever you’re going through a tough time, letting you know they’re around if you need to talk. The best part is, they genuinely mean it.
8. They Make an Effort to Stay in Touch.
©iStock/svetikd
You’ve been there before yourself, seeing someone who’s okay but not really your cup of tea. You don’t want to let them down or hurt their feelings, so you just sorta go with the slow fade. However, when someone is genuinely interested in you, that never happens. They text regularly, they make plans to hang out, and they stay up on your day-to-day life because they want to be a part of it. No matter how busy they are, they never lose touch for too long.
9. They Offer unfiltered honesty.
By this, I don’t mean that they’re rude and critical of everything you do. However, someone who’s trying to build something real with you will want to get off on the right foot, and that can’t happen if one or both of you is lying. You know they’re really interested in you when they prioritize honesty from the get-go, even if what they have to say might not get the best response. You have to respect their respect for the truth — it’s a rare quality to have these days.
10. They Respect Your Boundaries.
Someone who’s genuinely interested in you isn’t going to go out of their way to push your buttons or test your boundaries. Instead, they’re going to find out what you’re comfortable with and what your deal-breakers are and make sure they never step over the line. They want you to feel safe, supported, and understood, so your comfort is a priority for them. It’s actually pretty refreshing — they just might be a keeper.
