Wouldn’t be wonderful if guys actually meant “I love you” every time they said it? It’s not a perfect world and as you already know, the L-word isn’t sacred. It’s often just used as the key to your vagina. Seriously, why are women still sleeping with guys because they lie about love?
Does he mean I love you when he says it? I know it sucks, but you actually have to ask yourself that question. You don’t want to fall victim to your emotions only to find out he’s lying. I’m not saying every guy does this, but learning how to tell when he means it helps you pick out the good guys from the bad.
He’s genuinely interested in what you say.
A man who actually loves you listens to what you say. He’ll ask questions. He’ll remember to ask about that big presentation at work or how your friend’s doing with her breakup. Sure, he’ll miss some things, but communication is important to him.
You’ve already had sex.
Usually guys resort to the love lie to get sex. If you’ve already had sex and you’re not withholding it, he probably actually means it when he says it. This just means he wants you for more than sex.
He’s not pressuring you for sex.
If he says the words and is constantly hinting or asking for sex, it’s a good bet that he’s lying. It’s just one more way to try and get you to put out. Don’t fall for it.
He says it just to say it.
You haven’t pressured him, you didn’t say it first and he’s not trying to get anything out of you. He honestly just said it to say it. I know it’s surprising, but just go with it. Wait a little to make sure there isn’t a hidden reason, but a random “I love you” just might be sincere.
He says it voluntarily.
Saying “I love you” to him first might make him feel pressured to say it back. It’s not that he doesn’t care about you, but he doesn’t want to hurt you either. Of course, trying to pressure him into it is likely going to get you a lie too. Let him say it voluntarily if you really want to know how he feels.
He says it first.
Men don’t like being the first to say it. Yet, when they really mean it, they’ll take a chance and tell you how they feel. When he says it first without asking for anything in return, he probably means it. If sex or something else he wants isn’t involved, he means it.
He’s always working to woo you.
Yes, I said “woo.” If he’s always trying to make you happy and impress you, he really does care. He genuinely wants to make you smile and show you how he feels. At some point, he just has to tell you.
He’s introduced you to family and friends.
If all he wants is sex, he’s not going to bother introducing you to everyone. When he starts introducing you, it means he wants those he cares about most to like you and vice versa. It’s a good sign he really does mean it.
He enjoys going out with your friends.
A man who really loves you doesn’t mind going out with your friends sometimes. He loves seeing you have fun and getting to know those closest to you. I’m not saying he’ll be your best friend’s bestie too, but he’ll happily tag along on double dates and even some mostly girl nights.
He loves to just hold you.
When it’s not just about sex anymore, he definitely means it. Having him hold you close while watching TV and whispering “I love you” in your ear will melt your heart. When he does it and continues to hold you without trying to grope you, it’s sincere.
He’s already mentioned the future.
Is he already talking about a future together? Does he say “we” more than “I”? The more he talks about the future, the more likely it is that the means “I love you.”
He’s actually supportive and encouraging.
Guys who are lying about how they feel aren’t concerned about being supportive. They couldn’t care less whether you get in to get your master’s degree or how training is going for your first marathon. Supportive men tend to mean the L-word.
His eyes say it even louder.
Watch his eyes. He’ll look you in the eyes, say the words and you’ll know. If he’s saying it first, he’ll likely even seem shy and insecure because he’s afraid you won’t say it back.
He can’t help but smile around you.
You know that smile you get on your face when you think about the man you love? He’ll do the same thing if he means what he says. When you walk in a room, his face lights up. It’s a really good sign he’s being sincere.
He puts you first and doesn’t ignore you.
If he’s lying, he’ll probably put his friends, hobbies and everything else first. When you come first and he treats you like a priority, he means what he says. He’s proving he loves you even before he says it.
I know it’s tricky sometimes to tell whether his “I love you” is sincere or not. If several of the above are true, it’s safe to say that he’s being honest. Feel free to let your heart fill with love and don’t be afraid to say it back.
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