12 Things I Really Appreciate About Being Alone After A Long-Term Relationship

Ending a long-term relationship and being alone again can be scary and intimidating. However, surprisingly, I also relish my new independence and freedom! I’ve learned that it’s often the little things that mean the most to me and which I enjoy. There are so many perks to being alone and I seriously recommend it to anyone.

  1. No stress! Relationships can be so damn stressful. I love not having to worry that the guy I’m dating is going to lose interest in me or fall in love with someone else. That can really get me down at times. But no man around means no worries about him hurting me.
  2. I can leave my phone alone. When I’m in a relationship with someone, I’m strapped to my phone like it’s oxygen. When I don’t have someone who’s going to call or text, I can just leave my phone at home and go out and do stuff. It’s nice not to have my nose buried in a screen all day.
  3. I have more money. Relationships can be expensive at times. Just look at how you have to shell out money for dates, for instance. When I’m single, I have much more money at my disposal and I can do whatever I want with it.
  4. I don’t have to take on someone else’s drama. I don’t have to let the guy I’m dating bring me down with his problems, issues, dramas, and bad moods. That always happens with toxic guys because I’m quite an empath. By being alone, I can deal with my drama and not have to worry about anyone else’s feelings or problems. It’s great!
  5. I can stop shaving. I can’t help it – when I’m dating a guy, I want to eliminate body hair as much as possible. But when no one’s going to be seeing me naked, I can let a forest grow on my legs if I want.
  6. I can be more creative. When I’m alone, my creativity soars. It’s amazing how that happens and I love to make the most of it. So instead of feeling sad that I’m alone on a Friday night, I do something creative instead. It feels so good, almost like being on a date with myself.
  7. I don’t have to do anything. There’s always pressure to do things in a relationship, from filling up spare time with activities to partying with couple friends, or whatever. It can be too much at times. I love that I can do absolutely nothing, like stay in bed and read all day long, without feeling an ounce of guilt.
  8. I can make snap decisions as a single woman. If I feel like eating pizza every day for a week or buy a kitten, I can do it without first having to check with someone if it’s cool with them. For example, my ex was allergic to cats so I could never have a kitten and it killed me! Being on my own after that relationship was awesome because I could get a furry friend (or five) and not have to take another person’s needs into consideration.
  9. I get back in tune with myself. With all the time I have for my thoughts and feelings, I can really re-discover myself. It’s always fun for me to think back to who I was before and during my last relationship, and who I am now that it’s no longer in my life. It’s interesting and helps me see where I’m at so that I can move forward in the best way for my self-growth.
  10. I can watch trashy tv without feeling guilty. Watching shows that my exes would turn their noses up at was the worst. But being single means there’s no compromise required when it comes to binge-watching my favorite series and reality shows. Fantastic.
  11. I don’t have to compromise in other ways, either. Knowing I have to compromise regularly is one of the most stressful things about LTRs, especially if the guy I’m dating expects me to compromise all the time. The best thing about being single is that I don’t have to do any compromising whatsoever. If I don’t want to meet with friends or go to some event or have dinner with their crazy aunt, I don’t have to – and there aren’t as many consequences as not compromising in a romantic relationship. I’m off the hook!
  12. I love having more choice. They say you can have it all but not at once. Unless you’re single, that is! Then you can have everything you want. Part of the reason is that you don’t have to consider your partner, but it’s also because you can dip your toes in lots of different hobbies, situations, and experiences without having to commit to just one. If I feel like going to yoga this weekend or moving to a different city, I can do them both – and more. No one’s going to text me and say, “Hey, you can’t go to yoga because we’ve got that thing this weekend.” Ha.


Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.