Real friends are life’s treasures. Fake friends? Eh, not so much. Spotting the difference is key, so here are some behaviors that scream, “This friendship is a scam!” If you relate to more than a few of these, it may be time to cut ties with them so you can focus on more meaningful relationships in your life.
1. They’re Only Around for the Good Times.
Fun nights out? They’re front and center. Bad day, need to vent? Suddenly, their schedule is mysteriously packed. Real friends stick around during the rough patches, fake ones only appear when it’s convenient for them. After all, what fun is a friend who isn’t always there for the party?
2. It’s the “Me, Me, Me” Show.
Conversations revolve entirely around them, their problems, their drama. They rarely ask how YOU are and seem to zone out when you try to talk about yourself. Real friendships are two-way streets, fake ones feel more like a constant detour into their world. Your life becomes the boring background music to their thrilling reality show.
3. They’re The Queen (or King) of the Backhanded Compliment.
“Wow, that dress is…brave.” The subtle dig disguised as praise is their specialty. They make you question yourself, chipping away at your confidence while pretending to be supportive. Real friends uplift you genuinely, no weird passive-aggressiveness attached. A truly supportive friend wants you to feel confident, not confused.
4. They judge everything you do.
They disapprove of your choices – your partner, job, haircut, you name it. They can’t resist offering unsolicited “advice”, making you feel second-guessed and small. Real friends accept you as you are, even if they don’t always agree with everything you do. They know the difference between offering support and imposing their opinions on your life.
5. They pretend you’re closer than you are on social media.
Online, they’re the picture of #friendshipgoals! In reality, your connection is lukewarm at best. They crave the appearance of close friendships, but don’t put in the actual effort to build them. Real friendships exist beyond a filtered Instagram feed. Forget the online portrayal, it’s the real-life connection that truly counts.
6. They go AWOL for ages.
You reach out, make plans…and get radio silence. They’re flaky and unreliable, always with a half-baked excuse. Real friends prioritize their time with you because they genuinely value the relationship, not just when it suits them. If your friend is always MIA, it might be time to reconsider how much you bother reaching out in the first place.
7. They don’t know how (or refuse!) to keep your secrets.
You confide in them, and the next day the whole friend group knows. They can’t resist juicy gossip, even if it means betraying your trust. Real friends guard your secrets like a high-security vault. Trust is a cornerstone of true friendship, something a fake friend doesn’t understand.
8. They don’t want you to grow.
You’re trying to better yourself, but they constantly drag you down. They subtly sabotage your goals and dismiss your ambitions. Real friends celebrate your wins and encourage you to strive for more, not hold you back. They want to see you shine, not dim your light to make themselves feel better.
9. They’re always competing with you.
Your success makes them secretly jealous instead of happy for you. They downplay your achievements or try to one-up you. Real friends are your cheerleaders, and their support feels genuine, not tinged with weird rivalry. A true friend’s joy at your success reflects their own self-confidence – something a fake friend might lack.
10. They’re an emotional black hole.
They constantly complain and wallow in negativity, draining your energy. They rarely acknowledge your feelings and quickly shift the focus back to their own problems. Real friends offer support and try to lift each other up, not drag each other into misery.
11. They’re hot and cold with whether they actually even like you.
They blow hot and cold in the friendship. One minute they’re super attentive, the next they ignore you for days. The inconsistency creates confusion and makes you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells. Real friends offer stability and consistent presence in your life.
12. They only take — they never, ever give back.
They need favors, rides, and emotional support but are mysteriously absent when you need the same. The friendship feels unbalanced, with all your energy flowing in one direction. Real friends understand that healthy friendships involve give and take.
13. They do a lot of dumping on you.
They remember you exist when THEY need someone to rant to or trauma dump on. But when you’re facing your own problems, they’re not there for you in the same way. Real friends are there to offer emotional support through thick and thin, not just use you as a sounding board.
14. They’re a drama magnet.
Their life is endless chaos, and they somehow drag you into it. They’re always feuding with someone or stirring up trouble, and you often find yourself caught in the crossfire. Real friends bring a sense of peace and positivity into your life, not unnecessary drama and conflict.
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