What Are The Spiritual Meanings Of Dreaming About Your Ex? Here Are Some Possibilities

Dreams can be a fascinating peek into our subconscious minds, revealing hidden emotions, desires, or fears. Dreaming about an ex, in particular, can evoke a whirlwind of emotions that you don’t know what to do with and that leave you feeling pretty unsettled in your waking life. While it’s easy to dismiss such dreams as mere remnants of the past, many spiritual traditions and dream interpreters believe that these dreams carry a much deeper significance. That might sound a little woo-woo or new-agey, but it actually makes a lot of sense.

Of course, there are sometimes very obvious and simple explanations for why your former partner is showing up when you’re asleep, but sometimes you have to dig a little further to uncover the spiritual meanings of dreaming about your ex. Read on for a few of the possible meanings.

  1. You have unfinished business. Dreaming about an ex can indicate unresolved issues or feelings. It doesn’t necessarily mean you want to be back with them, but perhaps there’s a conversation left unsaid, an apology that needs giving or receiving, or closure that has yet to be attained.
  2. It’s a reflection of self-love. In spiritual contexts, relationships often mirror our relationship with ourselves. Dreaming of an ex might be a sign that you’re coming to terms with past self-esteem issues or learning to love and value yourself more. Maybe you were your best self when you were with them, so their appearance signifies that you’ve found your way back to that version of you.
  3. You worry about repeating old mistakes. If the relationship with your ex was tumultuous or hurtful, the dream might be a warning from your higher self to recognize and avoid repeating toxic patterns in current or future relationships.
  4. It might be a symbol of release. This is one of the most common spiritual meanings of dreaming of an ex. This is particularly true if you’re dreaming of saying goodbye or parting ways with an ex in a dream, as it can be symbolic of your soul finally letting go, moving on, and making space for new beginnings.
  5. You’re reassessing your life choices. Your ex might symbolize a time in your life or a part of your personality that you’ve left behind. The dream could be urging you to reconsider decisions and realign with your true self or values. You might even be questioning if breaking up was the right thing to do, especially if it was a spur of the moment decision.
  6. You feel incomplete in some way. The dream may represent feelings of incompletion or an aspect of your life that’s unfulfilled. It may not be about the ex, but rather a career path, a passion, or another avenue of life you left behind. Because your ex was a huge part of your life, they show up as part of your subconscious.
  7. You really want to be forgiven or to forgive them. In many spiritual traditions, forgiveness is a path to healing, making this one of the most popular meanings of dreaming about an ex. It might be a nudge towards forgiving them—or yourself—for past mistakes or hurts.
  8. You want to find a sense of balance. Relationships often involve a balance of give and take. If you dream of your ex, it might symbolize a search for balance in your current life, whether emotionally, professionally, or spiritually.
  9. You learned a lot from that relationship. Your subconscious could be highlighting the lessons you’ve gleaned from that relationship, urging you to remember them and use that wisdom in present situations. This is often one of the most common spiritual meanings of dreaming about your ex, as even if things ended badly, you no doubt will have been through a lot together and changed as a person as a result.
  10. You’re reconnecting with lost parts of yourself. Sometimes, in relationships, we suppress parts of ourselves to keep the peace. Dreaming of an ex might be a sign that you’re ready to reconnect with lost parts of yourself and embrace them fully. This is especially true if you felt like you lost sight of who you are when you were with them. Seeing them might be your way of showing them your authentic self, even now.
  11. You have a fear of abandonment. If the dream involves your ex leaving or ignoring you, it might highlight deep-seated fears of abandonment or rejection, urging you to address and heal them. Even if you know the relationship was meant to end and you initiated it, your feelings of neglect may still remain.
  12. You want to meld that part of your past into your present. Seeing your ex in positive scenarios or in situations where you’re working together might symbolize a desire to integrate various aspects of your life, melding lessons from the past with your present journey.
  13. It might be a manifestation of regret. This is another common spiritual meaning of dreaming of your ex. Sometimes, our subconscious brings forth feelings of regret or missed opportunities. Dreaming of your ex could represent moments you wish you’d acted differently or things you’d hoped would have gone another way.
  14. You want to reconcile or get back together. This one doesn’t take rocket science. Even if you don’t consciously want to reunite with an ex, your spirit might crave reconciliation on some level. This doesn’t necessarily mean rekindling the romance; it could be a simple desire for peace and mutual understanding.
  15. Your subconscious is trying to warn you against temptation. If you’re in a relationship with someone new and dream of an ex, it might be a cautionary sign against potential temptations or reminders to appreciate and nurture your current relationship. Don’t look to the past and let it ruin your future.
  16. It’s an indication that you’re feeling stagnant in life. Your spiritual self may be hinting that you’re stuck in a past life phase and need to evolve. This dream could be a push to break free from old patterns and move forward. It could be a sign that it’s time to push yourself out of your comfort zone and try something new.
  17. It shows a need for self-reflection. An ex might symbolize not just a person but a period of your life. Dreaming about them could be a prompt from your soul to reflect on how you’ve grown since then and what lessons that phase taught you.
  18. It’s a symbol of vulnerability. This is an obviously spiritual meaning behind seeing your ex in a dream. If the dream with them exposes you to vulnerabilities—like feeling lost, sad, or insecure—it might be a sign that you need to address these feelings in your waking life, ensuring they don’t impact your current relationships or self-worth.
  19. The dream is pushing you to face your fears. Your ex could represent a challenging phase or a set of obstacles. Dreaming of them might be a spiritual directive to face your fears, confront challenges head-on, and embrace personal growth.
  20. It’s an affirmation of personal growth. On a positive note, if you see yourself handling situations with an ex in a dream more confidently or assertively than you did in real life, it might be a spiritual affirmation of your growth and increased self-awareness.

What can you do if you keep dreaming about your ex?

  1. Get introspective and analyze what’s going on. Reflect on the dream’s content and the emotions it evokes. Understanding its root cause can help diminish its power. Consider meditating or journaling to process these thoughts. Even if there’s no spiritual meaning behind dreaming of your ex and there is a more obvious explanation, you should know what that is so you can figure out what to do about it.
  2. Seek closure. Determine if unresolved issues are triggering these dreams. While closure doesn’t always mean reconnecting with your ex, it can involve coming to terms with past emotions or situations. Sometimes, simply accepting the past can bring closure.
  3. Work with a therapist if need be. If the dreams persist and are emotionally taxing, consider therapy. A therapist can provide tools and insights to help process emotions and past relationships. They can also help you work through any trauma or baggage you’re carrying around that could be behind the dreams.
  4. Stay in the moment. Focus on your current life. New activities, strengthening current relationships, and exploring new passions can remind your subconscious that you’ve moved on. Sometimes it’s hard when a dream feels so real to pull yourself out of it and into the waking world, but you need to try!
  5. Reinforce positive self-talk. Remind yourself that you’ve grown since that relationship. Positive affirmations about your worth and progress can help shift your subconscious focus.
  6. Limit triggers that lead to dreams of your ex. If certain activities, songs, or places remind you of your ex, consider taking a break from them to see if it changes the frequency of the dreams.
  7. Accept that dreams aren’t real. Understand that dreams, no matter how vivid, don’t dictate your current reality. They’re a mix of memories, emotions, and daily stimuli.
  8. Establish a different nighttime routine. Sometimes, a consistent bedtime routine, including relaxation exercises or reading, can help divert your mind and lead to more peaceful sleep.

By taking these steps and understanding that dreams are a natural part of the subconscious processing what you went thorugh, you can navigate the emotional landscape of recurring dreams about an ex and work towards more relaxed, ex-free nights.

Gail is Bolde's social media and partnership manager, as well as an all-around behind-the-scenes renaissance woman. She worked for more than 25 years in her city's local government before making the switch to women's lifestyle and relationship sites, initially at HelloGiggles before making the switch to Bolde.