What To Say To Stop A Mansplainer In His Tracks

What To Say To Stop A Mansplainer In His Tracks

Dealing with mansplaining is frustrating and exhausting. You might roll your eyes and walk away, but sometimes mansplaining can have real consequences, especially in the workplace. If you’re tired of being talked down to, it’s time to reclaim your conversational space. Here are some tactics to shut down mansplainers and make sure your voice is heard.

1. The polite brush-off

Sometimes, you just need the interruption to stop. Try a simple but firm, “Thanks, but I’ve got this covered” or, “I appreciate the thought, but I’m going to finish my point.” This sets a boundary without being overly confrontational, and it shows you won’t be derailed from whatever you were explaining.

2. Calling it out (with a smile)

For repeat offenders, a little humor can blunt the impact. Try, “Wow, you really seem to know a lot about my area of expertise!” or “Thanks for explaining my job to me.” The playful sarcasm might make them realize their misstep, and might subtly clue in other people around you about what’s happening.

3. Flipping the script

Ask them to explain their reasoning by saying something like, “Interesting! Tell me more about why you think that.” It forces them to back up their “mansplanation” and can expose the (likely massive) gaps in their actual knowledge. Sometimes making them explain their overconfidence reveals how little they really know, leaving them stumbling to fill in the blanks.

4. The direct approach

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If all else fails, be straightforward. “I notice you often interrupt me to explain things I already understand. I’d appreciate it if you let me finish my thoughts.” It’s clear, assertive, and leaves no room for misinterpretation, making it harder for them to play the “I didn’t realize” card.

5. The team player approach

If you’re in a group setting, get help from the people around you. A simple, “I think Sarah was about to make a point, let’s hear her out,” redirects the flow in a subtle but supportive way. This takes the confrontation off of you and demonstrates that you value other people’s contributions. Plus, it gives the targets of mansplaining a chance to reclaim the conversational space.

6. Setting a firm boundary

Sometimes a clear, unwavering line is the way to go. Try, “Please don’t interrupt me. I’m capable of finishing my own sentences.” It’s direct and highlights the inappropriate behavior for what it is. This works best if you can maintain a neutral tone, even if you’re feeling frustrated on the inside, since it communicates that you’re not going to tolerate being talked over.

7. The “benefit of the doubt” question

In some cases, there’s a chance the person genuinely means well (even if they’re clueless). You could ask something like, “Are you trying to be helpful, or do you assume I don’t know what I’m talking about?” This forces them to confront their own potential bias and opens the door for them to self-correct their behavior. It also sets the stage for a wider conversation about the harm of mansplaining, if that’s something you feel comfortable initiating.

8. Highlighting the pattern

If it’s a chronic offender, try, “This is a pattern. I’ve noticed you often explain things to me that I already know.” Calling attention to their repeated behavior makes it harder to dismiss as an accident or misunderstanding. It highlights the issue as something deeper than a one-time slip-up and suggests it might even be a form of unconscious bias on their part.

9. The expert card

If their mansplanation is way off-base, let them know: “Actually, my background is in [relevant field], so I’m familiar with this topic.” This shuts down inaccurate “explanations” by asserting your own knowledge and can help undermine the mansplainer’s sense of authority. For even more impact, consider adding a follow-up question like, “Would you like to hear my perspective as someone with expertise in this area?”

10. The “explain it back” technique

Ask them to repeat their explanation: “Just so I’m clear, are you saying [summarize their mansplanation]?” This forces them to listen to their own words, which can sometimes highlight how unnecessary or unhelpful they were. It also gives you the opportunity to correct any misconceptions they may have stated, and the act of repeating their words back can sometimes expose how condescending they sound.

11. Call for backup

If you’re in a work setting, don’t be afraid to bring it up to HR or a manager. Documenting instances of mansplaining can help build a case if the behavior is part of a larger pattern of disrespect. Seeking support from authority figures shows that you take the issue seriously and signals that this type of behavior is unacceptable in your workplace. Plus, HR may have additional strategies or resources to help you navigate the situation.

11. Ignoring them completely

In some cases, silence is the loudest response. If the mansplaining isn’t crucial to the situation, simply continue with what you were saying as if they hadn’t spoken. This sends a clear message that their interruptions won’t derail you or distract you from your point. Remember, your attention is valuable, and you don’t have to reward disrespectful behavior with engagement.

12. Focus on the impact

two colleagues having heated conversation

Instead of getting bogged down in an argument, shift the conversation. Try saying, “When you interrupt me like that, it makes it difficult for me to contribute effectively.” This highlights the negative consequences of their behavior without directly accusing them of being sexist (although they might get the message anyway).

13. The ally approach

man and woman with coffee talking outsideiStock

If you see someone else being mansplained to, speak up! Something like, “I think we should let Jessica finish her thought,” or “I’m really interested to hear what Kayla was saying.” interrupts the pattern and shows solidarity with the target of the mansplaining. Having allies can make a big difference in changing the culture of a workplace or social environment.

14. Change the subject

Confident businessman communicating with colleague having coffee. Male and female professionals are standing in office. They are discussing strategies at textile industry.

Sometimes, the best way to derail a mansplainer is to completely pivot the topic. Ask them a question about something irrelevant, or simply shift the discussion in a different direction. This disrupts their ‘flow’ and denies them the satisfaction of feeling like the expert on whatever they were lecturing you about.

15. Walk away

Sometimes, the best response is no response. If someone is determined to be condescending, it’s okay to disengage. Simply say, “This conversation isn’t productive, I’m going to step away.” You don’t owe anyone your time or energy, especially if they’re refusing to treat you with respect. Remember, prioritizing your mental well-being and refusing to engage with disrespectful behavior is a powerful act in itself.

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Piper Ryan is a NYC-based writer and matchmaker who works to bring millennials who are sick of dating apps and the bar scene together in an organic and efficient way. To date, she's paired up more than 120 couples, many of whom have gone on to get married. Her work has been highlighted in The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Cut, and many more.

In addition to runnnig her own business, Piper is passionate about charity work, advocating for vulnerable women and children in her local area and across the country. She is currently working on her first book, a non-fiction collection of stories focusing on female empowerment.
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