10 Signs The Guy You’re Dating Has A Serious Ego Problem

10 Signs The Guy You’re Dating Has A Serious Ego Problem iStock

Some people really can’t understand the fact that the world doesn’t revolve around them… and unfortunately, they tend to end up swimming around in the dating pool at some point. If you’re not sure if the guy you’re seeing has a healthy amount of self-confidence, take a look at these signs that suggest his ego is way too huge to handle and he has a major problem.

  1. He places way too much value on “likes.” A man who’s constantly worried about how many people are clicking or double-tapping his posts on social media is way too self-absorbed. It’s normal to get a little mood boost when your selfie gets a lot of attention, but if it seems like everything he does revolves around being the most popular dude on Facebook, he’s way too wrapped up in himself to be ready for a relationship.
  2. It’s his way or the highway. Egomaniacs have a hard time understanding that other people have wants, needs, and valid opinions. If he ALWAYS has to pick what you do, what time you’re doing it, and who you’re doing it with, it’s a pretty clear sign that he thinks that this relationship only involves one person… and it’s not you.
  3. He always needs to be the center of attention. A guy with ego issues isn’t going to feel comfortable when someone else is taking up the spotlight. He’s going to do everything he can to be the life of the party — whether or not he’s actually at a party. At first, you might think he’s just outgoing and exciting, but after a while, it’ll become clear that his goal isn’t to make other people have fun but to make them focus completely on him. You’re clearly dating a narcissist.
  4. He constantly has drama in his life. Is he one of those people who always seems to have some kind of beef with someone else? If he acts like everyone he ran into over the past week was a jerk, sorry, but HE’S the jerk. Of course, he’ll never admit that. People with inflated egos assume that they’re perfect, so when they run into problems, it means the world’s out to get them. A guy whose life seems like a soap opera isn’t simply unlucky — he invites this drama because it makes him feel important.
  5. He can’t take criticism. I don’t know if anyone particularly enjoys being told that they’re wrong, but if the guy you’re with can’t control his ego, he’s probably extra defensive when someone has the nerve to tell him that he messed something up. In his mind, he’s flawless, and when someone implies anything otherwise, he freaks out because it puts a crack in the pedestal he’s always standing on.
  6. All his photos are selfies. Guys have just as much of a right to “feel their look” as women do, but there’s a problem when 95% of his photos are just him. We tend to take snapshots of the things and people that matter most to us, so if he favors daily mirror pics over taking photos with his friends, family, or even pets, it’s pretty clear that he thinks he’s the only person who brings any value to his life.
  7. He’s a one-upper. You tell him how you went to the gym three times this week, and he tells you he went five times. You mention that you’re tired because you only slept five hours, and he tells you to be thankful you at least got more than four hours of sleep — you know, like he did. It’s not enough for him to simply live his life; he has to have it better or worse than someone else. For a guy with an ego issue, everything is about comparison, and he has to make sure that everyone else knows how their achievements and struggles pale in relation to his.
  8. Everything always has to come back to him. This is one of the most obvious signs he has an ego problem. It’s one thing to relate your experiences to someone else’s so they realize you understand and sympathize with them, but that’s not an egomaniac’s endgame. If his friend is bummed out because he lost his job, this guy will reply with a story about the time that he lost his job… and then somehow manage to make his friend’s venting session all about him, him, him. A guy who thinks the world revolves around him isn’t going to care about someone else’s issues unless they directly involve him.
  9. He can’t empathize. Since everything in this guy’s life revolves around him, he truly can’t imagine what it might be like to walk a single step in another person’s shoes. According to him, as long as it’s not his problem, it’s not a problem at all… and if it is his problem, everyone had better drop what they’re doing to help it get better. If he lacks empathy, that’s a serious problem.
  10. He’s always putting other people down. When a person’s confidence transforms into arrogance, they need to put in a lot of work to maintain that image of themselves they have in their mind. So if this guy can’t possibly build his ego up any higher, he’s probably going to start tearing other people down in an effort to make himself look better by comparison. Staying with a guy who feels the need to insult you and everyone else around him is a recipe for disaster.
Averi is a word nerd and Brazilian jiu jitsu brown belt. She's also a TEFL/TESOL-certified ESL teacher and an equine enthusiast. Originally from Pennsylvania, she lived in Costa Rica for a while before moving to Australia. In addition to her work as a writer and editor for Bolde, she also has bylines with Little Things and regularly writes for Jiu-Jitsu Times.

You can follow Averi on Instagram @bjjaveri or on Twitter under the same handle.