10 Ways To Put A Guy Firmly In The Friend Zone When He Won’t Take The Hint

Kate Hudson taught us in “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” that there are tons of nuts things girls do that drive guys away. Most of us try to avoid doing things like that, but sometimes when a guy is really interested and you’re just not feeling it, there are a few things you can do to discourage him from pursuing you any further. Of course, honesty is usually the best policy, but if you want him to let him down easy and spare his ego, a little subtlety can go a long way. Of course, you’ve probably already tried being subtle, but the key is not to give him ANYTHING to go on.

  1. Don’t send him mixed signals. Any physical affection is only going to give him the wrong idea, so just avoid all of it to be safe. That includes friendly hand-holding, cuddling, and kissing. Leading him on is never cool. No matter how lonely you are or how harmless you think it is, if you want to put a guy in the friend zone, keep your distance.
  2. Never make him a priority. If you aren’t interested in dating him, you definitely shouldn’t be reorganizing your schedule to spend time with him. That’s what a girlfriend does, and you’re definitely not his girlfriend. Sure, you want to show him courtesy and care as his friend, but draw the line somewhere appropriate for a platonic connection.
  3. Avoid meeting his friends and/or family. If a guy is eager to introduce you to the important people in his life, you need to nip that in the bud immediately. It’s only going to humiliate him more if he has to explain to his friends later that you totally friend-zoned him.
  4. Don’t work too hard on your appearance when you’re hanging out with him. Obviously, you don’t wear makeup and do your hair just for guys, but if it looks like you put in extra effort to look nice every time you see him, he’s naturally going to think it’s at least a little bit for him. So go au naturale the majority of the time and he won’t get the wrong impression.
  5. Compare him to a family member. Saying things like, “You’re like the brother I never had” or, “You remind me of my dad” will send a pretty clear message that you don’t see him in a romantic or sexual way whatsoever. Unless, of course, he’s a bit warped and thinks you have daddy issues and are attracted to men that can double as father figures… ugh. Generally speaking, however, this is one of the best ways to put a guy in the friend zone without doing so directly.
  6. Mention how much you appreciate his friendship. If he hears you talking about how happy you are with how your non-relationship is going, he might think twice before attempting to move beyond the platonic. Here’s hoping, anyway.
  7. Act like his wing woman. Give him tips on how to approach girls, and offer some relationship wisdom as if you have no idea it’s actually you he’s interested in. If he thinks he’s dodged the humiliating bullet of making a move on you and getting shut down, he’ll probably decide to just quit while he’s ahead.
  8. Talk about bodily functions in his presence. Everybody poops, and we all know that. But generally, if a girl likes a guy, she’ll try to avoid drawing attention to disgusting bodily functions. If you’re farting and burping around him like it’s no big thing, he’ll end up seeing you as a bro rather than a potential date.
  9. Don’t spend too much time with him. Even if he’s a good friend you’re used to hanging out with all the time, if you think he might have feelings for you, do him a favor and back off a little bit. It will send the message that you have other things going on, and you generally aren’t thinking about him when he’s not around.
  10. Mention other guys you’re interested in. You don’t have to tell him every detail about your love life, but if you casually mention you went on a good date the other night, he’ll get the hint that he’s not really on your radar at the moment when it comes to dating.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.