Before you can share your life with someone else, at least wholly, it’s a good idea if you know exactly who you are and what you want. It’s those who go into serious relationships with others, after having cultivated a relationship with themselves, who are not only happier as individuals within that relationship, but they also find that they are one half of a happy and healthy couple. It’s an amazing feeling to have.
Even if every single person around you is settling down and turning their back on singlehood, you need to realize that the longer you’re single, the better you and your relationship will be for it. So instead of being bummed that you’re going to be a bridesmaid yet again, realize it’s actually a good thing. Here are 13 reasons why being single for long periods of time makes you a better catch than if you just went from relationship to relationship, without any proper vacation time for yourself.
- You know who you are. Too many people get into relationships when they’re young, before they even know who they really are. The person you are at 21 is far different than the woman you’ll be at 25 or even 30. With each year you learn more about who are and what you believe. You become not just a catch because of it, but a whole and complete person.
- You’re not needy. You’ve been single long enough to know that, although having a partner is great, you don’t need one. You can kill the big, scary spider yourself, treat yourself to dinner, and aren’t going to have an emotional breakdown if you don’t get a text every hour from the person you’re dating. You’re ability to stand on your own and not see a relationship as a crutch on which to lean will come across as refreshing to someone interested in dating you.
- You have your priorities in line.Being alone has given you ample time to realize what’s important and what’s not. You don’t let yourself get distracted by drama or silly things, and always have your eye on moving forward toward your goal. If only everyone could have that crap in order.
- You can take care of yourself. Sure, you can kill the spider in your apartment yourself, but you can also stand up for yourself, pay your bills on time, and other grown up things like supporting yourself both emotionally and financially. Your independency makes it so you have no need for someone to sweep you off your feet and take care of you. (Although there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be spoiled sometimes.)
- You have a career. You’re not sitting around trying to get you MRS, because you’re too busy focusing on getting your CEO. There’s nothing sexier than a woman with ambition, especially one who isn’t counting down the days to which she’ll become Mrs. So And So.
- You have established great friendships.Even if they’re not romantic relationships, friendships teach people how to communicate and create healthy bonds. In doing so, you’re preparing yourself to make for one hell of a partner.
- You have lots of interests. Being single has given you time to try out things you’ve always wanted to. You have a weekly trapeze class, know that you’re awesome at weaving, and have already been to 22 countries, (and you’re just getting started!) Having so many interests makes you even more interesting, of course. Who wouldn’t want to be with you to celebrate when you reach country #50?
- You have a life. Between your career and your friends and everything else you have going on, you have a full life. This makes you a catch because most people want to become part of someone’s life, not be the reason that person suddenly has a life.
- You’re happy doing your own thing. Your date cancels? No big deal. They feel like hanging out with their friends and not you? Whatever. You’ve got it covered, because you genuinely enjoy your own company and experiencing things on your own.
- You won’t be settling. One of the saddest qualities in a human being, especially when it comes to dating, is settling. It’s more than just giving up, but actually resigning to a fallacy that nothing better is coming along. People can smell that level of desperation miles away; a smell that no one will ever smell on you because you just don’t have it.
- You don’t play games. Having become the complete person you are thanks to being single for so long, you don’t play games and that’s a trait that sooo many people love. Dating often comes with too much BS and skirting around issues, but you don’t play that way, because your time is too valuable to waste it on games.
- You can function without a partner. The fact that you are so able to just be you without anyone else messing with it makes you almost an anomaly. People don’t want to be the reason someone gets out of bed (unless they’re a control freak, of course), and with you that will never be an issue. You get out of bed because you have a life to live and things to do, and yes, at some point, that will involve kissing your partner.
- You know the difference between need and want. “Needing” something can be dangerous, especially when it’s confused with “wanting.” Ultimately, what makes you such a catch is the fact that you want a relationship with someone, but you don’t need it… and that’s an awesome way to live.