15 Little Habits That Are Making You Emotionally Fragile

15 Little Habits That Are Making You Emotionally Fragile

Mental toughness will get you a long way in life, but there may be certain habits and behaviors you have that are causing you to feel emotionally fragile and always on the verge of cracking. If you do these things, you’re setting yourself up for failure and ensuring you end up miserable.

1. You always expect the worst.

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If you’re constantly bracing for catastrophe, you’re setting yourself up for a life of unnecessary stress. This habit is like living with a raincloud overhead even on sunny days. It’s not about being naive or wearing rose-tinted glasses, but about giving life a chance to surprise you in a good way. Remember, expecting the worst can turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy, making you miss out on opportunities because you’re too busy worrying about what could go wrong.

2. You compare yourself to everyone around you.

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Stop turning life into a never-ending competition. When you measure your worth against other people’s, you’re playing a game you can’t win. There’s always going to be someone smarter, richer, or more successful. This habit erodes your self-esteem and feeds into a cycle of self-doubt. Focus on your path and realize that life isn’t a race. Your journey is unique, and comparing it to someone else’s is like comparing apples to spaceships.

3. You want validation for all of your life choices.

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Your decisions should be based on your values and what works for you, not on applause from the gallery. This constant need for validation makes you dependent on others’ opinions and robs you of your autonomy. Trust yourself and understand that it’s okay to make choices that others might not understand or agree with. It’s so important to realize your self-worth is intrinsic and independent of what anyone else thinks.

4. You ignore your emotional needs.

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You can’t just shove your feelings into a closet and hope they’ll disappear. Ignoring your emotional needs leads to burnout, resentment, and unhappiness. Start by acknowledging your feelings, understanding what they’re telling you, and addressing them head-on. It’s not self-indulgent; it’s self-care.

5. You don’t take care of your physical health.

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Your body is the vehicle for your life’s journey, and if you don’t maintain it, it won’t take you far. Neglecting physical health – be it through poor diet, lack of exercise, or inadequate sleep – directly impacts your emotional resilience. Physical health and emotional well-being are intertwined; if one suffers, the other likely follows. Prioritize your physical health as a foundation for emotional strength.

6. You hold on to past hurts instead of letting them go.

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This tendency to get stuck in the past can drain your emotional energy. Practicing forgiveness, not necessarily for the sake of other people but for your own peace and well-being, is really important. Forgiving isn’t about condoning what happened; it’s about freeing yourself from the chains of bitterness. Letting go allows you to move forward and opens up space for new experiences and joys.

7. You don’t set boundaries.

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The absence of personal boundaries can lead to emotional exhaustion, according to the University of Rochester Medical Center. This leads to overcommitment, resentment, and burnout. Boundaries are so important for your mental health and well-being. They communicate to people what you find acceptable and unacceptable, giving you a sense of control and respect in your relationships and life.

8. You always try to please everyone but yourself.

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Constantly trying to please others at your expense is a fast track to unhappiness. It’s impossible to satisfy everyone, and in the process, you lose sight of what you truly want and need. It leads to a loss of self-identity and resentment. Remember, it’s not selfish to prioritize your own needs; it’s good for you!

9. You avoid having difficult conversations.

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Avoiding tough conversations doesn’t make problems disappear; it often makes them worse. Addressing issues head-on might be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary for resolving conflicts and moving forward. When you avoid these conversations, misunderstandings fester and resentment builds. You have to find the courage to face the tough stuff; it leads to stronger, more honest relationships and a greater sense of personal integrity.

10. You don’t embrace change.

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Change is inevitable, and trying to fight it or pretend it’s not happening can leave you stuck in the past. When you don’t embrace change, you miss out on opportunities for growth and new experiences. It’s okay to feel unsure or scared, but don’t let those feelings paralyze you. Adaptability is a key component of resilience and personal development, according to the Mayo Clinic.

11. You neglect your passions.

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Your passions energize and give your life purpose. When you neglect them, life becomes mundane, boring, and really kind of pointless in many ways. Reconnect with what brings you joy and excitement. You’ll be so much happier and feel so much more fulfilled if you do.

12. You don’t invest in your relationships.

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You can’t expect relationships to thrive on autopilot. Ignoring them is a sure way to end up lonely and regretful. Relationships are like plants; they need regular attention and care. If you’re not putting in the effort, don’t be surprised when they start to fade away. Take the time to connect, communicate, and show appreciation. It’s not just about what you get out of them, but what you put in.

13. You have negative self-talk.

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Knock off the constant self-bashing. It’s not humility, it’s self-sabotage. This habit chips away at your self-esteem and opens the door to anxiety and depression. Start treating yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a good friend. When negative thoughts crop up, challenge them. Build yourself up instead of tearing yourself down.

14. You don’t live in the present.

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You have to stop obsessing over what’s already happened or what might never happen. You’re missing out on what’s happening right now. This habit of not being present leads to a life half-lived. Focus on the here and now. The past is unchangeable, and the future is uncertain. The present is the only time you can actually live and make a difference.

15. You don’t strive for personal growth.

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If you’re not growing, you’re stagnating. Complacency might feel comfortable, but it’s a trap. Life doesn’t stand still, and neither should you. Personal growth is about continuously improving yourself and adapting to life’s changes. It’s about becoming the best version of yourself. Don’t settle for mediocrity when you have the potential for greatness.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.