9 Things Women Lie About In Relationships

9 Things Women Lie About In Relationships ©iStock/EXTREME-PHOTOGRAPHER

Everybody lies from time to time, and sometimes those lies are told in relationships. It’s not a matter of deceit, but a matter of not wanting to rock the boat, cause conflict, or incite a war. We’re all guilty of these types of lies, the ones we agonize over then choose to tell, and of course women are no different. But what do women lie about in relationships? In life, we might lie about our age, our weight, and whether or not our hair color is real, but in relationships it’s a bit more complicated. Here are nine things women tend to lie about to their significant other.

  1. That we’re “fine.” Sometimes it’s just so much easier to say that we’re “fine” than deal with whatever it is that’s pissing us off. Women, definitely more than men, tend to go to the whole “I’m fine” thing when things get heated and it’s a total lie. We’re not fine.
  2. Our anger level. To go along with the whole “I’m fine” scenario, we also tend to not let on to our true anger level. We’d rather breathe deeply and scream into a pillow than try to rationalize exactly why and how much we’re totally pissed off.
  3. Our true feelings about your family. Oh, I totally love your mom! Sure, she’s completely crazy and diabolical and your sisters treat me like I’m leper, but they’re all so great! I really love them. *eye roll*
  4. How much money we’ve spent. Well, if it’s our money that we’ve spent, then it’s not our partner’s concern anyway, but since our partner won’t likely understand how important it is to have at least one pair of $700 shoes, then it’s best to just lie and say we got them at Payless.
  5. Our interest in sports. I had a friend who, after marrying a crazy football fan, read six or seven books about it so she’d understand how it works and try to embrace the thrill of it. It just never happened. The books only deepened her disdain for football, but that didn’t stop her from watching every game with him. So, yeah, most of us just don’t care about the “big game.”
  6. Number of sexual partners. Well, as the double standards goes, if our number is “too low,” we’re some sort of prude, but if the number is too high, we’re promiscuous. So, why admit to any number at all? It’s our sexual experience and isn’t information that needs to be shared.
  7. Our arrival time. Not to stereotype my gender, but I’ve never met a woman who is ever where she’s supposed to be in just a minute, especially when it comes to getting ready in the morning. Eye makeup alone takes three times that.
  8. The truth about your bedroom skills. Although I’m not advocating faking it (because NO, never do that), I am saying that sometimes it’s best to just tell your partner they’re really fantastic so you don’t have to deal with them sulking for days.
  9. Having second thoughts. It’s not mean, cruel, or even deceitful, but every woman, at one point in her relationship, has thought about whether the person she’s with is “The One,” or if maybe there’s someone “better” for her out there. It’s a totally normal and healthy thought, and one that you should question why you’re questioning it when it comes up. It might take you to an entirely different place all together; maybe to “The One.”
Amanda Chatel is a sexual health, mental health, and wellness journalist with more than a decade of experience. Her work has been featured in Shape, Glamour, SELF, Harper's Bazaar, The Atlantic, Forbes, Elle, Mic, Men's Health and Bustle, where she was a lifestyle writer for seven years. In 2019, The League included Amanda in their "15 Inspirational Feminists Every Single Person Should Follow on Twitter" list.

Amanda has a bachelor's degree in English and master's degree in Creative Writing from the University of New Hampshire. She divides her time between NYC, Paris, and Barcelona.

You can follow her on Instagram @la_chatel or on Twitter @angrychatel.