A dad on Reddit has been defended after he revealed that he chose not to take his kids from a previous marriage on vacation with his new wife. Taking to the AITA sub, the man revealed that his divorce from his ex-wife and the mother of his two kids was acrimonious, and that’s putting it lightly. He now has a whole new family and is quite happy, which hasn’t gone down well with his ex-wife.
“My ex-wife and I have two kids, 16 and 14. We had a turbulent marriage and split for many reasons. It wasn’t amicable and I had to fight for custody,” he wrote. “[My ex-wife] and I both remarried. She didn’t have children with her new husband. I have three (9F, 7F, 5M) kids with my wife and also gained a stepdaughter (19).”
“As far as blended families go, I am really lucky that we are all happy. My stepdaughter and I have a good relationship and [the other children] love their siblings from my wife.”
OP then claimed that his ex-wife is racist, which was a major reason they split in the first place. Because of this, the ex has apparently been “on a crusade, trying to make my family’s life as difficult as possible.” So, she refused when it came time for her to sign travel documents so that his two oldest children could go on vacation with the man’s new family.
OP’s ex refused to allow the kids to go on vacation with his new family
“I then decided to go and book the vacation anyway but without [the children]. Understandably, they were not happy. Normally, I don’t badmouth [my ex-wife] in front of them, but I told them it’s because of her that they can’t go,” he explained.
This caused his ex to “become really angry” alongside his older kids. They seemed to believe the man and his new family should have canceled the vacation if everyone couldn’t go, but OP disagrees. And, as it turns out, so do Reddit commenters who stepped in to let him know he is indeed not the a**hole in this situation.
“NTA but I really hope you’re holding on to any communication from [the ex-wife] that can be presented to your lawyer. This screams as an attempt to alienate you from your first kids,” one person wrote in the comments. Another added: “Your ex is really toxic – I hope you’re documenting her behavior. And your kids are old enough to know that she refused them permission to travel.”
However, there were a few who agreed that he shouldn’t have gone on vacation without the two oldest. “Right or wrong, if you go without your first family, they’ll never forget it and the relationship will be permanently affected,” the critic claimed.
So, what do you think?