You Only Get One Chance With Me—If You Screw It Up, You Lose

Sometimes it feels like there are no guys out there willing to make an effort when it comes to dating, which is why it’s finally time to cut out the BS once and for all. If they screw up, it’s their loss. Here’s why you should only be giving guys one chance before cutting them off for good—I know I will.

  1. Chasing after a man is a waste of time. I have way better things to do with my time than try to make a relationship work when the other person isn’t invested. Texting back and forth and being put off whenever I suggest going out is such a waste of my time. I have better things to do than prove to a guy that I’m an amazing person. Relationships are a two-way street, and if he isn’t willing to do his share of the work to get to know me, it’s a total waste of my time to try to make him.
  2. I’m worth being pursued. Any guy is lucky to have me and I’m totally aware of that. If he screws up and doesn’t take the time to learn about me or spend time with me, he can’t expect me to give him a second chance. I’m worth being pursued, and if he’s not going to put in the work it takes to win me, he’s not worth it. I’ll offer him the same in return, of course, but I’m not about a guy who half-asses things.
  3. I have better things to do than convince him I’m worth it. If a guy has ever had a chance with me, he should know that I’m worth it. He shouldn’t expect me to tell him why. If he blows it, I have zero sympathy for him. He knew how amazing I was when he screwed it up, and giving him a second chance wouldn’t change his behavior.
  4. I deserve so much more than a guy who isn’t 100% committed. If a guy is going to date me, he should be prepared to be fully committed. If I’m willing to give my all to a relationship, I expect my guy to do the same, and if he screws up, he’s just proving that he’s not holding up his end of the bargain. Being hot and cold is a total deal breaker for me.
  5. I may be loyal but he has to earn it. When I’m fully committed, I’ll do anything to preserve the relationship. But I know what I’m worth and I don’t just give myself to people easily. A guy has to earn my loyalty and my love, and if he screws up, it’s over. I am not in this relationship to make him feel good about himself. He gets one chance to show me he deserves my loyalty, and that’s it.
  6. Putting up with a guy’s crap is not something I’m interested in. I have enough crap to deal with on a regular basis. My commute, for instance, or the fact that my rent keeps going up. I don’t need to add a guy to the list of problems I have to deal with. If he wants to date me, he should be making my life easier, not harder. Being lazy about our relationship is a huge turn off for me, and it’s not something I’m willing to put up with, no matter how much I wanted our relationship to work.
  7. A second chance would give him the wrong idea. There’s no way I’m going to let a guy think I’m a pushover. He got his chance. I’m not going to give him a second one and make him think he can get away with screwing up again. If I keep forgiving him for being a less than adequate partner, he isn’t going to learn anything. If he’s in a relationship with me, he can’t screw up and expect me to forget about it and move on.
  8. I only have space in my life for genuine relationships. I don’t need to put up with someone who doesn’t take a relationship with me seriously. There are so many things in life that are important to me, like my friends and my job and paying off my student loan. I’ll only enter into a relationship with someone who is ready to have a real, genuine connection.
  9. It’s time guys learned that girls aren’t desperate for them. If I’m not dating someone, it’s not because I can’t get a guy, it’s because I choose to be single. I’m only going to date someone if I’m really interested in him. It’s about time guys learned that not every girl is desperate to be in a relationship in them. Just because a guy is cute and has a good pickup line doesn’t mean I’m going to put up with his bullshit in order to date him. He has to be worth it.
  10. I’m totally fine on my own, and there are plenty of guys ready to take his place if I want them to. If a guy screws it up with me, I won’t be left crying in my pajamas for a month cradling a tub of ice cream. If he was dumb enough to lose me, it’s his loss, and I have no issues moving on. Being single isn’t something I avoid in the slightest, and whenever I am ready to date again, there are plenty of guys ready to take his place.
Rose Nolan is a writer and editor from Austin, TX who focuses on all things female and fabulous. You can find her geeking out about the latest film releases or stunning crowds with her endless capacity for celebrity trivia. If you can’t find her, she’s probably eating tacos.