If You’re Sick Of Guys Half-Assing Relationships With You, Stop Letting Them

Whether it’s due to modern dating or just bad luck, I feel like way too many guys out there are getting lazy when it comes to relationships. It seems like every woman I know ends up getting frustrated by emotional leeches who refuse to commit or can’t be bothered to text back in a timely manner. If you find yourself stuck with one of these bums, this is why you should either convince him to get his act together or let you carry on as a single woman:

  1. IT DRAINS YOUR SELF CONFIDENCE. When you put up with half-assed behavior, you’re constantly left wondering whether or not there’s something wrong with you, and your brain might chalk it up to you not being worthy of love. You have to remember that you’re worth a real relationship. Life isn’t meant to be lived lying in bed waiting for a guy to text you back.
  2. IT LOWERS HIS RESPECT FOR YOU. Never allow yourself to be a doormat. When you don’t call a guy out for his stuff or you continue to play along with his games, he’ll eventually stop respecting you. Stick up for yourself and you’ll have a much easier time weeding out the guys who treat you like a game.
  3. You’re letting yourself give up on romance. Remember when you were younger and drooled over the seemingly perfect guys in romantic movies? You might’ve been told that it wasn’t realistic to expect fairy-tale romance, but I’m calling BS on that. You truly should never lower your standards for a relationship. Stop going for guys who only text you after 10 PM or take two days to reply to you. There are men out there who will treat you like a priority, and you owe to yourself to seek them out.
  4. IT SENDS THE WRONG MESSAGE. You attract what you put up with. If you’re known as the girl who’s really picky when it comes to relationships, chances are you’ll attract more genuine guys rather than losers who can’t be bothered to lift a finger for you.
  5. YOU’RE SETTING THE BAR WAY TOO LOW.Let’s give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he’s never had a real relationship and just doesn’t know any better. But if you let a guy only commit to you 50 percent of the time, you’re letting him know that you only want 50 percent of his heart. Once you’ve showed him that you don’t have high expectations for him, your chances of a solid relationship with him have been chucked out the door forever.
  6. IT’S DAMAGING YOUR VIEWS ON TRUE LOVE. Your mind will stop believing in romance if you don’t start demanding that your relationship be filled with it. When you let a guy get away with mediocrity, you’re not just setting low standards for him — you’re also showing yourself what you’re willing to settle for. By maintaining your expectations and holding your partners to them, you’re ensuring that you’ll never tolerate less than you deserve.
  7. YOU’RE PUTTING YOUR SEXUAL HEALTH AT RISK. I know, I know — you’re on the pill, and you swear you’re being safe by always using condoms. But here’s the reality of the situation: When you’re sleeping with someone who’s half-assing your relationship, he’s probably sleeping with someone else too, which is putting your reproductive health at risk. I’m not saying sleeping around is wrong, but considering 15- to 24-year-olds account for over half of all new STD infections, you need to be careful about who you knock boots with.
  8. LIFE IS JUST TOO SHORT FOR CRAPPY RELATIONSHIPS. What’s the point in being in a relationship with a guy who won’t commit? Life is far too short to be wandering around contemplating whether he’s into you or using you. If he doesn’t make it clear from the get-go what his intentions are, just let him go. You’re too valuable to be treated like a toy.
  9. ANYTHING LESS THAN A REAL DATE ISN’T A REAL DATE. The days of Netflix and chill are gone… or at least, they should be. If all you ever do is go to his place to “chill” or hang out after 10 PM, you’re letting romance die before it even gets the chance to blossom. There are men out there who still do things the old-fashioned way, and they’re worth waiting for.
  10. They should put forth the same effort that you do. If you’re giving it your all, your partner should be, too. You’re pulling your weight in this relationship, and a guy who refuses to pull his will only hold you back. If he doesn’t get his ass in gear, it’s time to ditch him and look for someone who stands beside you rather than letting you drag him behind you.
Megan is a teacher, writer, drinker of mimosas, lover of polysyndetons and puppies and sports and also expensive coffee and overly editing her Instagram posts