There are a ton of reasons not to date a guy who’s recently divorced, but there are also some pretty good reasons to give him a chance. Depending on what you’re looking for in a relationship, he may be exactly what you need — here’s why:
- He’s not looking for anything serious. A guy who’s just come out of a marriage isn’t looking to jump straight back into one. If you’re looking for something casual, he’s the guy for you. He’s not going to move too fast or pressure you for commitment, which is great if you’re trying to go with the flow.
- He’s not afraid of commitment. Although he’s probably not looking for another serious, long-term relationship just yet, he isn’t afraid of one either. Sometimes love hits when you least expect it. If you’re dating a guy who’s getting divorced, you know he’s open to the possibility of getting serious if you hit it off.
- He’s willing to try new things. A divorce can be pretty traumatic, even a “simple” one. Just like any other life changing event, it’ll prompt him to think about who he really is and what he wants out of life. This is the perfect time for him to experiment and, if you’re lucky, he’ll do it with you.
- He’s got a different point of view. Someone who fell in love, got married, fell out of love, and got divorced probably has an interesting perspective on dating, sex, and life in general. It might seem intimidating to date a guy who’s getting divorced, but give him a chance and you’ll open yourself up to new ideas and experiences.
- He has other stuff going on in his life. This is a great one for the independent ladies. If you’re tired of the boy who follows you around like a puppy it’s time to consider the divorced man who won’t. If he’s got kids, you can guarantee they’re going to take up a substantial chunk of his time. Even if he doesn’t have kids, the divorce itself is going to keep him busy enough to give you some alone time.
- He doesn’t play mind games. A man going through a divorce — or a guy who’s already been through one — has had enough of mind games and will have no interest in playing them with you. He wants something simple and straightforward. He doesn’t have time for games and neither should you.
- You’ll find out who your real friends are. This can be tricky but it’s definitely true. When you start dating a divorcee, you’ll find out really quickly who your true friends are — especially if he has kids. Everybody will want to give you advice (literally everybody). Your hairdresser and dental hygienist will start telling you why it’s a terrible idea and some friends will be totally against it. Everybody’s entitled to their opinion but your true friends are the ones who express their concerns once, support your decision, and promise to help you pick up the pieces if it all goes wrong.
- You can really stretch yourself. If your man is getting divorced, there’s a good chance he’s also older than you. That’s fantastic! Being with someone whose experiences are drastically different to yours lets you stretch and grow in ways you never considered. It can be scary but it’s worth it.
- He’s probably seen it all. An ex-married man (especially one with kids) has seen it all. He doesn’t care if you break out in hives or want to lounge in your ugliest, most comfortable sweats. If the rest of his life is in turmoil he wants you to be as easy going as possible so skip the high maintenance routine and just be yourself. It’s easier for you and it’s a breath of fresh air for him.
- Just make sure he’s really divorced! This is the absolute most important thing. Do not help a man cheat on his wife. If he says he’s separated, it’s up to you to judge but please don’t let yourself become the other woman. Nobody likes her and nobody enjoys being her either.
