How To Stay Single When Everyone Around You Is Coupling Up

Being single is fun, so what’s with all the pressure to find a boyfriend or girlfriend? If you love the single life but are constantly being persuaded by your couple friends to find a mate, here’s how you can stay happy and single.

Find some single friends. When all of your friends are coupling up, it can get pretty irritating always being the third or fifth wheel when you go out. Even someone comfortable with their single lifestyle can feel left out when couples are constantly all around you. So go out there and find other single gals you can have some fun with! Use friend apps like Bumble BFF or attend a local event like a restaurant or brewery opening.

Get out there and network. Making friends in adulthood is not as simple as it was when you were in high school or college. There aren’t a ton of people your age with the same likes surrounding you. You have to go out there and find it and work a little harder. Find events in your area based on your interests. Are you a young professional? Most chambers of commerce host young professional networking events, so check one out! If you love museums or art, find a local exhibition or event to attend. If you’re a fan of live music, go out and see a local (or non-local) band. Mingle with other concert-goers. When you dive into events that you love and are open to meeting someone new, you’ll find others with the same interests and could totally hit it off.

Get some alone time with your coupled-up friends. It always seems like people in relationships want nothing more than to spend every waking moment with each other. While it might seem that way, it’s not always the case. So message the group chat and ask your gals out for a ladies night! As the single friend, you can pull the reins and show your friends a good time wherever you go. They’ll likely be looking to you for all the fun, new activities.

Politely decline couple dates. It’s nice for your friends to want to include you in their couple outings, but if it’s the last thing you want to spend your Saturday doing, don’t do it! You can’t feel pressured to be in a couple if you limit your time around couples, am I right?

Find a BFF to do couple dates with. Where is it written that only couples can go on dates to fancy restaurants or hit up the farmers’ market? Find a single friend who loves to do those couple-y things and do them together! You don’t need a boyfriend or girlfriend for that, just a BFF.

Avoid pity fix-ups at all costs. Again, your friends have your best interest in mind with wanting to fix you up with a cute guy from their office, but if you’re set on being single, you don’t have to feel compelled to give in to your friends setting you up on blind dates. Don’t feel like you have to make up an excuse every time they ask. Just be honest. Tell them you’re loving the single life and don’t want to be in a relationship at the moment. When you’re upfront about it, you’ll keep your friends from continuing to try (though they may still from time to time).

Don’t feel bad if you start drifting from your friends. Not all friendships are meant to last a lifetime. It’s wonderful when they do, but it’s not realistic. When our friends are in different places in life than we are, it’s not always easy to find common ground. You may be more interested in jetting off for a weekend getaway at the beach while your friend is perfectly content going to the Farmer’s Market on Saturday morning strolling her twin babies. That’s OK!

Be OK with spending some time alone. One of the best things about being single is getting some quality alone time. If you can afford it, live alone while you’re single. There’s nothing like it! You don’t have to answer to anyone, clean up someone else’s mess, and never have to fight over the remote. One day, if you ever do decide to settle down and have a family, you’ll be glad you took advantage of the alone time when you had it.

Don’t give in to the pressure. Being around couples all the time can make you feel left out sometimes. You might want to give in and find someone for you because you want to fit in with your friends and do the couple-y things they do. But if it’s not what you want, don’t do it. You’ll only end up wasting your time with someone you aren’t really into being in a relationship you don’t really want. It’s your life, spend it how you want to: single, fierce, and happy.

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