I’m Making My Boyfriend Get Tested Before We Sleep Together & You Should Too

STDs aren’t the sexiest topic to talk about with partners, but it’s so important to do so. I’m not afraid to get dirty talking about sexual health because it affects both of us. In order for me to feel safe and protected when sleeping with my boyfriend, I asked him to get tested beforehand. You may be thinking that I should just use condoms and be done, but that’s just not enough.

  1. It’s better to be safe than sorry. What’s the harm in having him get tested? There are no negative consequences in knowing his STD status but there certainly will be if he’s infected and I sleep with him. I’d much rather go the “better safe than sorry” route even if I am kind of a pain in the butt. No one was ever too safe around STDs, but there are plenty of people who are sorry.
  2. I don’t want to have to worry. If he just goes ahead and gets tested and everything comes back clean then I won’t have to fret at all. We can have sex without worry. This will be more fun and satisfying for both of us. Otherwise, I’m going to be freaking the heck out and rightfully so because I’d be wondering if I caught anything. I’d rather let my head hit the pillow without worry, thanks.
  3. He has a questionable past. What brought this whole thing up was a conversation about his past that revealed he may have been exposed to STDs. It was very concerning and fortunately came up before we had sex. He’s also a recovering IV drug user, so I definitely have some concerns about his STD status. Love him to pieces and I’m not judging him, I just won’t trust his status until I see a clean bill of health.
  4. STDs are no joke. Some STDs are forever and some cause irreparable damage to your body. Being unsafe around sex really isn’t an option because there’s so much at stake. I know some people take the topic lightly or aren’t careful about sex, but I don’t want to be one of those people.
  5. Some STDs you can even get with a condom. Herpes, HPV, and syphilis (just to name a few) can all be contracted even while wearing a condom. So, I could go ahead and have sex with him with a condom thinking that I’d be totally protected, but I’d be wrong. I’d still be at risk for exposure to more STDs than I’d care to take a gamble on. I think a lot of people aren’t aware of this fact, they just think condoms provide 100% guaranteed protection. I’m glad I’ve been educated on the issue.
  6. It’s just healthy to get tested anyway. When I said there’s nothing to lose, I also can say that there’s plenty to be gained. It’s healthy and arguably necessary to be tested on a regular basis (unless you’re in a long-term monogamous relationship). It’s just good to know your status and it’s a sigh of relief to know that you’re clean. I’m doing both myself and him a favor in making the request that he be tested.
  7. I’m going to get tested too. I’m not just going to tell him to get tested and shrug off what my status may be. No, I’m also going to go ahead and do it myself. I think it’s really important for both of us to do and I care about not passing anything on to him, either. Anyways, I’ll just take comfort in knowing my status (well, hopefully).
  8. We can have sex without condoms. If he comes back with a clean bill of health (and I do, too) then we can have sex without using condoms. This is kind of fun for a variety of reasons. Most men say that it feels better for them. I prefer sex without condoms as well because it also feels better for me. I also think that it can be a romantic thing to be that intimate as long as we’ve both been tested.
  9. It’s a good practice to be in. Not that it’s my job or place to tell him what to do, but being tested regularly is a good habit to develop. I know for myself I’m trying to get better at doing it with my significant others. I don’t really hook up with people, so I can afford to wait for them to be tested and get the results back. I hope I can keep up the practice in the future.
  10. I don’t mind waiting for sex anyway. One of the downfalls is that it takes a while for my boyfriend to get his butt to the clinic and get his results back. I don’t mind being patient with sex, though. I can wait. I care more about my sexual health than I do getting laid.
Ginelle has been writing professionally for more than six years and has a bachelor’s degree in digital marketing & design. Her writing has appeared on Birdie, Thought Catalog, Tiny Buddha and more. You can follow her on Instagram @ginelletesta, via her Facebook page, or through her website at ginelletesta.com.