My Crush Ignores Me — Does This Mean He Doesn’t Like Me?

It’s always painful when the person you like doesn’t pay you any attention at all. You might be tempted to think that this means he doesn’t like you, but fear not. There are probably actually a lot of mind games being played, so all is not as it seems. Silence doesn’t necessarily mean that he doesn’t like you, don’t worry. Here’s what could be happening when your crush ignores you.

1. He’s nervous. If you think guys are bad at communicating in general circumstances, that’s nothing compared to when romance is involved. This is especially true if he happens to be a shy guy as well. There’s nothing wrong with that, but you just have to know how to read him. If he’s nervous, he probably still really likes you but just doesn’t know how to express it. He won’t want to put himself out then in a vulnerable position if he doesn’t know how you feel. Bear that in mind.
2. He thinks you don’t like him. Before we focus too much on his movements, have you made your own feelings clear? Or, are you both safeguarding your feelings so much that no one has any idea what’s going on? This might be the time to reflect on your own emotional availability. Start to feed in your interest in him so that he knows. Guys can’t be expected to be mind-readers any more than anyone else can. Try to assert yourself and use your body language to show your connection and see if he gets the hint. He might not be ignoring you, he’s probably just oblivious!
3. He wants to know for sure before making a move. This is a common factor. It’s hard to know what type of silence you’re being met with. It might be disinterest, but it’s more than likely just concern or indecision. Romantic situations like this are always ambiguous and one person needs to take that leap. We’re all human, though. No one wants to put themselves out there. He’s just waiting for confirmation. This is a great time to tell him you like him.
4. He’s considering other options. On the flipside, maybe he’s fielding a few offers and trying to figure out his feelings. It might be that he is interested in a few people and talking to a few girls, but trying to narrow down what he wants. Maybe he’s even a player, who knows.
5. He’s not ready for a relationship. If he seems reluctant to engage with your attempts at flirting, don’t take it too personally. It might be that he just got out of a relationship and isn’t ready for a new one. Or, even if that isn’t the reason, ‘No’ is a complete sentence. He doesn’t owe you an explanation as to why he isn’t interested in you, and that’s fine.
6. He wants you to chase him. There’s always the thrill of the chase, isn’t there. It’s possible that he’s trying to string you along with inconstant gestures of affection to get you to chase him. It makes him feel powerful and desirable, and it proves to him that you’re interested in him. It’s not subtle, but there are no games required.
7. He thinks you’re out of his league. It’s also worth considering that he’s very interested in you, but presumes that you’re too far out of his league to even approach. This happens a lot with guys with low self-esteem when they’re trying to negotiate their teenage and adolescent years. Try to gently tell your crush that you are interested without scaring him off and you’ll notice a difference in how he treats you.
8. His friends are giving him bad advice. Bear in mind that women have strong, emotionally-grounded friendships a lot more frequently than men. This means that guys will be more likely to be egged on by their friends to get girls to chase them, or to ghost them when things get hard. That’s the easy way out, but if it’s all your friends are telling you, you’re going to do it. Pay attention to who they’re hanging out with and it might explain your crush’s behavior.

How to get him to pay more attention to you

If your crush ignores you and you want to change his behavior, it’ll require a little effort on your part. However, if he’s actually interested in you, you won’t have to work too hard (nor should you have to) to get him on side.

1. Strike up a conversation with him. If he’s a bit more reserved or feels nervous around you, he might find it too intimidating to begin a conversation. However, he’ll be more than willing to engage if you make the first move. Bond with him over common interests or ask him about something you know he’s done lately. This could be the beginning of a beautiful thing.
2. Ask him to hang out. Asking a guy out on a date might seem intimidating, but if you get the vibe (or have heard through the grapevine) that he’d be open to a romance with you, why not ask him to hang out? This will make it clear that you’re interested in him as more than a friend and should jolt him to attention.
3. Read the room. If your crush ignores you and nothing you do to show your interest is yielding results, you have to know when to walk away. You don’t want to make a fool of yourself or waste your time on someone who clearly isn’t interested or isn’t ready to meet you halfway.

There you are, a few ways of troubleshooting whether or not radio silence actually means your crush is interested or not. Just take the pressure off. There are plenty of fish in the sea, after all.