In the age of social media, it’s the norm to portray a perfect image of your life online. Even when the reality is very different, many people make it seem like things are going better than they are in their general lives and relationships. And if you do these eight things, you might be one of them! Keep reading to see if your behavior is a sign your relationship isn’t as happy as you make it out to be.
- Constantly posting photos on social media There’s nothing wrong with celebrating your relationship and posting photos of it to share with your loved ones. But when you constantly post photos because you need validation, that signifies that maybe your relationship isn’t as happy as you thought it was. You should feel that your relationship is enough as it is. It should make you happy automatically; not only when you get lots of comments on social media talking about what a power couple you are. Rather, constantly craving that validation is a sign of insecurity.
- Taking any chance to flirt with someone else Every couple has their own stance on harmless flirting. Some don’t mind if their partners flirt. Others have strict no-flirting policies. If you always take any chance to flirt with someone else, though, it could mean that your relationship isn’t as happy as you portray it to be. That could be a sign that you don’t get the attention you’d like from your partner, so you seek it elsewhere. Or perhaps you resent your partner and want to punish them by flirting with others. It might even be a sign that you’re bored with your partner and need to find excitement from another source. It’s certainly a sign that your relationship isn’t as happy as you claim.
- Putting down other people’s relationships Putting down other people isn’t a sign of happiness or confidence. If you feel the need to bring others down, it’s almost always because you want them to join you in your misery. Insulting or mocking other couples in particular can be a sign that you’re not happy with your own relationship, so you don’t want them to be happy with theirs either. It’s the same thing if you tend to put down single people. Maybe you secretly wish you were single and make yourself feel better by pushing the narrative that single people aren’t happy.
- Celebrating when you get time away from your partner It’s absolutely okay to have time away from your partner. But rejoicing when you get any time alone, as though you’re finally escaping them, isn’t the best sign. A relationship takes work and it isn’t always smooth sailing. But still, it shouldn’t feel like a chore. If your partner leaving you alone feels like a Friday afternoon, and being with them feels like a Monday morning, you probably aren’t that happy.
- Not wanting to hang out with your partner if you can’t post about it Do you only want to see your partner because it gives you social media content? Are you able to grab a bite with them or have a cute date night without posting about it? If no, then maybe your relationship is more about the image than the substance. As mentioned, it’s okay to share your relationship on social media—most people do. But there should also be a lot that goes on behind the scenes that’s just between the two of you. The happiness should come from seeing them, not from successfully posting about it.
- Setting strict rules for your partner Making your partner follow strict rules might suggest that your relationship isn’t that happy or healthy. Often, these rules come about because you don’t trust them like you should be able to. Similarly, if you have to follow strict rules, it could be that your partner doesn’t trust you or likes to control you, regardless of what you make it seem like online.
- Forcing your partner to fit an image It’s another sign that your relationship is all about the image when you force your partner to fit that image. Trying to make them dress the way you want them to, speak the way you want them to, and generally fit your idea of what’s acceptable is a red flag. It suggests that you don’t really care who your partner is or what they want. Rather, you only care about how they appear to the world.
- Hiding the problems you have from those closest to you All relationships have their own issues that they need to work through. You don’t have to air those problems for the world. But pretending that they don’t exist, even amongst your closest support system, could indicate that you’re making your relationship seem happier than it is. That’s especially true if there are people in your life that you share everything, and you feel like you can’t tell them the truth about what’s going on in your relationship. This isn’t just a sign your relationship isn’t happy, it’s a sign you may need to break up.
