There’s nothing worse than feeling like you have to walk on eggshells around someone. That’s why it’s so important to put people at ease as much as possible by being laid-back, welcoming, and non-judgmental. Are you doing a good job? If you notice the signs that someone feels comfortable around you, the answer is a big fat yes.
1. They Share Personal Stories.
When someone shares personal stories with you, it’s a big deal. It means they trust you enough to open up about their life experiences, which might include sensitive topics or fond memories. This sharing is a way of letting you into their world. It’s more than just small talk; it’s about making a connection on a deeper level. Pay attention to the stories they tell — these narratives often reveal what they value, their life experiences, and how they view the world.
2. They’re Not Always “on.”
If a person always seems to be in performance mode around you, they might not feel completely at ease. In contrast, someone who is comfortable will let their true personality shine through. They don’t feel the need to impress you constantly. This could mean they’re okay with having a chill day in, showing their silly side, or sharing their unpopular opinions. It’s about being authentic and not feeling the pressure to maintain a polished facade.
3. They Make Themselves at Home.
When someone is comfortable in your space, they tend to act more freely, as if they were in their own home. This might involve them lounging on your sofa, grabbing a drink from your fridge without asking, or kicking off their shoes. These actions show a level of familiarity and ease. It’s as if they’re saying, “I feel good and relaxed here with you.”
4. They’re Open and honest About Their Feelings.
Someone who feels comfortable around you will be more open about their feelings. They might share how they’re feeling about their day, discuss their mood changes, or even open up about deeper emotions. This openness is a significant indicator of comfort, as discussing one’s feelings requires vulnerability and trust. When someone shares their emotional state with you, it’s a sign they feel safe and understood in your presence, according to Verywell Mind.
5. Their Body Language Is Relaxed.
Body language is a powerful indicator of how comfortable someone feels. Relaxed body language includes maintaining natural eye contact (not too little, not too intense), an open posture (not crossing arms defensively), and generally more fluid and spontaneous movements. They might lean in while talking to you, mirror your body language, or show expressive facial reactions. These nonverbal cues often convey comfort and ease more accurately than words.
6. They Reach Out to You First.
When someone consistently initiates contact, it’s a clear sign they’re comfortable and enjoy your company. This could be through texts, calls, or suggesting plans to meet up. It shows they’re thinking about you and are eager to interact, not just waiting for you to make the first move. This initiative often means they feel a strong connection and are confident enough in your relationship to reach out without hesitation.
7. They Laugh and Joke Around.
Laughter is a natural response when we’re at ease. If someone frequently laughs and jokes with you, it’s a sign they feel relaxed in your presence. This behavior includes laughing at your jokes, sharing their own humorous stories, or even engaging in light-hearted banter. It indicates they’re comfortable enough to let their guard down and share moments of joy. It’s also a way of bonding and creating shared experiences that are enjoyable and memorable.
8. They Show Their Imperfections.
When someone is okay with showing their less-than-perfect side to you, it’s a strong indicator of comfort. This might include admitting mistakes, discussing personal weaknesses, or revealing insecurities. It means they don’t feel the need to impress you constantly and are confident that showing their vulnerabilities won’t change how you see them. This level of openness is a key element in building a deeper, more authentic relationship.
9. They Ask for Your Opinion or Advice.
Asking for your opinion or advice, especially on personal stuff, demonstrates trust and comfort. It shows they value your perspective and consider you a go-to person in times of need or decision-making. This kind of trust typically develops in relationships where both parties feel understood and supported. It’s not just about seeking guidance; it’s about acknowledging the importance of your role in their life.
10. They Don’t Shy Away from Awkward Topics.
Discussing awkward or personal topics requires a certain level of trust and comfort. If someone is willing to delve into subjects that are a bit sensitive or uncomfortable, it indicates they feel safe with you. They trust that you won’t judge them and that you’ll handle the conversation with care. This openness can cover a range of topics, from past relationships to family issues or personal struggles.
11. They’re Okay with Silence.
Comfort in a relationship isn’t just about great conversations; it’s also about being okay with silence (and according to Psychology Today, that’s a superpower). If someone is comfortable with you, they don’t feel the need to fill every moment with talk and there are no awkward silences. Sitting quietly, whether you’re doing your own things or just relaxing together, can be a sign of deep comfort. It means they’re at ease just having you around, without the pressure to constantly entertain or engage.
12. They Include You in Their Routine.
When someone starts incorporating you into their daily or weekly routines, it’s a sign they’re comfortable with you being a regular part of their life. This might include calling you during their grocery run, involving you in their workout routine, or making a habit of having weekly dinners together. It shows they’re integrating you into the fabric of their everyday life, which speaks volumes about their comfort and trust in the relationship.