If We All Talked About These 10 “Off-Limits” Things On The First Date, We’d Be Much Better Off

It’s basically understood that there are things we should never mention the first time we grab drinks with someone. Sometimes they make sense — bringing up our last breakup or being super negative is never good. Other times, it means there’s nothing to chat about at all. If we talked about these 10 things on the first date, we’d be much better off:

  1. How much we hate online dating. We should never date someone who actually loves the weirdness of online dating because that would mean they’re a crazy person. If we could chat honestly and openly about how exhausting this endless cycle is, we could find some common ground. And who knows, it could lead to a true connection.
  2. Our almost relationship history. We’ve all had our fair share of these ridiculous situations. So what if we’re not supposed to talk about our exes on the first date? Do these people even count as exes? If we could talk honestly about how many times we’ve liked someone and been disappointed, it would say a lot about us.
  3. Our stance on ghosting. Let’s just be real here: if this date doesn’t go well, one of us is totally doing some ghosting. We might as well talk about whether we think that it’s the worst or a necessary evil.
  4. Our political beliefs. We claim we should never talk about politics on the first date, but we’ve all mistakenly gone out with someone who thinks the complete opposite of us. It ruins the whole evening and kills the chance of a second date. We might as well put it all out there on the table.
  5. Our actual likes and dislikes. None of this claiming to like the latest Netflix craze or bands that we think make us look a lot closer. Let’s be honest about what we actually love, no matter how embarrassing.
  6. Our fears. We’re all afraid to love someone new, even if we claim we’re open to it. Let’s chat about it on the first date. Let’s say we’re scared to like someone more than they like us, or to make room in our schedule for a new person who is going to claim they’re too busy for us. Maybe the other person feels the same way.
  7. Our thoughts on compromise. If we could be straight up about what we love about our single life and what we could say goodbye to, things would work out so much smoother. We could say we absolutely can’t miss the latest episode of our favorite show and that Sunday morning is our favorite workout class of the week. There would be no disappointments later on.
  8. Our daily routine. Sure, we usually talk about our jobs and where we went to school on the first date, but what about our actual routine? If we’re a morning person, if we’re a night owl, if we live for our careers and hustle or have a bunch of hobbies. This would tell the other person a lot about us and help us really get to know each other.
  9. Our last date. Yeah, this might seem a bit weird, but that’s why it’s such a good idea. If anything, this would make for a hilarious conversation because dates are usually pretty funny/horrifying.
  10. Our actual stance on commitment. This would be the best first date conversation ever because if we could just admit how we really feel, we could save a lot of time. We could say we need two months of dating before we can even think about having The Talk. We could say our last partner was so clingy that we’re going to move slow, or that we’re finally ready for a real relationship. Just think how much better dating would be if we could do this.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.