Sometimes it’s hard to put your finger on what’s wrong in your relationship, but then you hear certain things that make you go, “Wait a minute…” We’re talking about those phrases that just don’t sit right, especially when they’re coming from someone who’s supposed to be all about you. You know, those sneaky little comments that can make you question yourself, your feelings, or even your sanity. When narcissists feel their power in relationships slipping, they’re likely to say these things to get back on top.
1. “You’re just too sensitive.”
You know when someone does something wrong, but instead of saying sorry, they’re like, “Oh, you’re just too sensitive”? That’s a classic move by a narcissist. They make it seem like you’re overreacting, so they don’t have to own up to their mistakes. It’s like they’re playing mind games to make you doubt yourself and keep you under their thumb. It’s super unfair and can make you feel like you’re always the problem, even when you’re not. And the worst part? It starts to mess with your head, making you think maybe they’re right, and you’re just being too emotional. Don’t let it slide – your feelings are valid!
2. “I’m the only one who truly understands you.”
Ever heard someone say they’re the only one who gets you? It sounds sweet, but be careful. Narcissists say this to make you think you can’t trust anyone in your other relationships. It’s like they’re trying to cut you off from your friends and family, so you think you only have them to rely on. It’s a sneaky way to control you and make you think you need them more than you actually do. And let’s be real, it’s a total lie. You’ve got people who care about you and understand you – don’t let one person make you think otherwise.
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4. “No one else would put up with you.”
This one’s a real confidence killer. They’re basically saying you’re so difficult that only they would bother to be with you. It’s a nasty way to make you feel grateful for their ‘tolerance’ and to make you think you can’t do better. Don’t fall for it. It’s just their way of keeping you around by making you feel bad about yourself. Remember, there are plenty of people out there who would love to be with you for who you are, not because they feel like they have to ‘put up with’ you.
5. “You’re just overthinking it.”
Ever brought up something that bothers you, and they tell you you’re overthinking? Classic narcissist move. They dismiss your feelings and concerns to avoid dealing with the real issues. It’s like they’re telling you your feelings don’t matter, which can really make you second-guess yourself. It’s a sly way of keeping you quiet and doubting your own thoughts. But hey, if something feels off to you, it’s worth talking about. Don’t let them brush off your concerns.
6. “I do everything for you, and you’re so ungrateful.”
This one’s all about guilt-tripping. They act like they’re doing so much for you, making you feel like you’re ungrateful if you have any complaints. It’s a way to flip the script and make you feel bad, even when you shouldn’t. Remember, just because someone does things for you doesn’t mean they get to treat you poorly. And you definitely don’t have to feel guilty for standing up for yourself or wanting to be treated better.
7. “You’re always trying to start a fight.”
This phrase is a total blame-shifter. Whenever you try to bring up something that’s bothering you, they turn it around and accuse you of being argumentative. It’s their way of making you feel like the bad guy for simply wanting to talk about issues. It shuts down communication and keeps you from standing up for yourself. And honestly, it’s super frustrating because it feels like you can’t ever bring up anything without being labeled as difficult.
8. “You owe me for everything I’ve done for you.”
This one’s about making you feel like you owe them something. They keep a tally of everything they’ve ever done for you and use it to make you feel guilty. It’s like they’re saying you have to put up with whatever they do because of their past ‘favors’. It’s a manipulative way to keep you tied to them. But remember, relationships aren’t about keeping score. You don’t owe someone for being decent to you.
9. “You have no idea how hard I work for you.”
Another guilt-inducing classic. They exaggerate all they do for you to make you feel bad for them. It’s a way to distract you from the real issues and make you feel like you have to keep them happy. It’s like they want a medal for just being decent, and it’s not cool. You should appreciate each other in a relationship, sure, but it shouldn’t be used as a weapon to make you feel bad.
10. “If you really loved me, you would…”
This is emotional blackmail. They challenge your love for them to get you to do what they want. It’s super manipulative because it makes you feel like you have to prove your love by doing things their way. It’s not fair, and love should never be about passing tests or jumping through hoops. A real partner wouldn’t make you feel like you have to earn their love all the time.
11. “You’re imagining things.”
Talk about messing with your head! This is where they deny your reality to make you doubt yourself. It’s a form of gaslighting, where they make you question what you know is true. It’s really damaging because it can make you lose trust in your own thoughts and feelings. It’s a major red flag and super toxic. Always trust your gut – if something feels off, it probably is. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
12. “You’re being irrational.”
Ever had someone tell you you’re being irrational when you’re just trying to express how you feel? It’s like they’re saying your emotions don’t make sense and shouldn’t be taken seriously. Narcissists pull this card to make you doubt your own feelings and back down in relationships. It’s frustrating because it feels like they’re not even trying to understand where you’re coming from. Just remember, your feelings are totally valid, no matter what they say. Don’t let them make you think you’re being crazy for having emotions.
13. “You should be thankful.”
This one is super condescending. They do something for you, and then hold it over your head like you should be eternally grateful. It’s their way of making you feel like you owe them big time for every little thing. But here’s the thing: in a healthy relationship, you do nice things for each other because you care, not to create a debt. You shouldn’t have to feel like you’re in someone’s debt just because they did something nice for you.
14. “I’m the best thing that ever happened to you.”
Talk about an ego, right? When someone says this, they’re trying to make you feel like you hit the jackpot with them, and without them, you’re nothing. It’s a super arrogant way to make you feel like you can’t do better than them. But let’s be real: you are your own best thing, and you don’t need someone else to define your worth. Don’t let them make you think they’re your everything. You’re awesome all on your own.
