A relationship will never work if you don’t trust the other person. While guys should be trying to earn yours, they also need to know that you aren’t constantly suspicious of their every move. Here are some ways that you can show your boyfriend that you trust him.
Don’t hover. Boyfriends aren’t toddlers. Yes, it may not seem like they’re adults all the time, but I assure you they really are. They don’t require constant supervision and there’s no need to follow him everywhere your guy everywhere he goes. There’s a fine line between wanting to spend time together and always wanting to be around him because you don’t trust him, and you need to find where that line is.
Never touch his phone. Dating someone doesn’t give you a right to look through someone’s phone. Even if you’re living together, you shouldn’t be doing that without permission. He has a right to keep his phone calls, texts, and emails private. Maybe you can do it without him noticing, but that doesn’t make it right. There’s also no way of knowing for sure that he hasn’t figured out what you’re up to. If he suspects even a little, it signals a lack of trust in the relationship.
Don’t hide/lock your phone. On the other end of the spectrum, you can’t make it seem like you’re going out of your way to keep him away from your phone. That’s a no-no if you want to have a trusting relationship. You have to trust that your boyfriend won’t snoop even if you leave it out in the open all the time. Believe me, he’ll notice if you always have your phone under lock and key, and he’ll know that you don’t trust him.
Let him make plans. This sounds simple but it can be a good way to show him that you trust him. For example, if you’re going out to dinner, let him pick the restaurant. If you go to the movies, allow him to pick what you see. To be fair, you’ll always want to add the line, “Pick something we’ll both like.” However, if you let him make these kinds of decisions, it’ll show him that you trust his judgment.
Let him be free. If you guys spend the night apart, don’t be the girlfriend who’s always “checking in.” It’s OK to send a text or two letting him know you miss him, but don’t be constantly calling or texting him to check up on what he’s doing. Also, if you go to a party together, don’t force him to stay at your side all night. Parties are for mingling, right? Also, boyfriends aren’t dogs—you can let them roam free in public without a leash. If you give him a little freedom, he’ll know that you trust him and your relationship will be better because of it.
Share bad news. If you’re upset about something, tell your boyfriend why. Even if it doesn’t relate to your relationship, don’t try to hide your feelings from him. If you confide in him, he’ll know that you trust him to know personal things about you. That’s the only way your relationship is going to work long-term.
Ask and take advice. Asking your boyfriend for advice is another great way to show him that you trust him and his judgment. Just tell him about your situation and then ask, “What do you think I should do?” The caveat is that you actually have to be open to his advice. If you already decided how you’re going to handle things regardless of what he says, you’ll do more harm than good. If you ask for advice and follow what he says, you’ll show him that you trust his insight.
Be on time. This sounds a little silly, but being on time can promote trust in a relationship. If you tell your boyfriend that you’ll be somewhere at a certain time then be there at that time. If you’re not on time or at least let him know you’ll be late, he won’t trust you, causing him to call into question whether you trust him. Showing up late is akin to a white lie, and even white lies hurt the trust in a relationship.
No inquisitions. Yes, people in a relationship tell each other things, but there’s a difference between sharing and badgering your partner for details on where they were and what they did. The latter is what you need to avoid if you want your boyfriend to know you trust him. It’s OK to ask one or two questions to give him a chance to share with you, but if you start playing 20 questions, it’ll come across as you not trusting him. If you back off and let him come to you, he’ll trust you and feel more comfortable sharing the details of his life with you.
Believe him. When your boyfriend speaks, believe him. This might be the biggest thing you can do to show him you trust him. Believe it or not, us guys can tell when you’re skeptical of us and it doesn’t feel good. If you believe us when we speak, we’ll be more likely to trust you. Once you feel that you trust us, we’ll go to considerable lengths not to break that trust. Ultimately, if you don’t trust someone enough to believe the things that come out of their mouth, you shouldn’t be in a relationship with them.
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