Have you ever complimented someone and they replied by saying, “You’re not so bad yourself”? You might’ve smiled to be polite but secretly wondered what they meant, exactly. Is it a compliment or a diss masked as a compliment? If someone you’re crushing on said this to you, would you consider it a hint that they’re interested in you too, or is that too much of a leap? Argh, it can be so confusing! But don’t worry – here are some things it could mean when someone tells you, “You’re not so bad yourself” so you don’t have to waste energy and time trying to figure it out.
1. It’s A Form Of Respect.
If you tell a co-worker that they’re great to work with and they reply by saying, “You’re not so bad yourself,” this is probably a way for them to show you some respect that you’ve shown them. Similarly, in your social circle, this compliment can be a way to forge mutual respect and admiration.
2. It’s A Polite Response.
Similar to the previous point, if you don’t know someone very well and you compliment them, when they reply by telling you that you’re not so bad yourself it can be a way for them to be polite. Sort of like saying, “Ditto.” They don’t have to brainstorm something complimentary, especially if they feel that they don’t know you well enough to describe how creative/smart/beautiful you are. Or, if they just don’t really like you. Yikes, that would just be weird.
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4. It’s Not A Major Compliment.
“You’re not so bad yourself” is a clever way to be nice to someone without having to give them a serious or meaningful compliment. It’s basically the small talk of compliments. So, if you’re crushing on someone and they reply with these words, you might wonder if it means they like you or not. To be honest, it’s difficult to say for sure one way or the other. This reply helps people to remain mysterious while being complimentary. Sneaky, sneaky.
5. It Can Be Flirtatious.
If you’ve gone out on a limb and complimented someone you’re interested in, like by telling them that they’re quite attractive, and they replied with “You’re not so bad yourself!” this could be seen as a legit flirting compliment back. Nice one. Of course, it helps to check the overall vibe that the person’s giving out, such as if they’re saying this while giving you strong body language cues that they like you, like a mischievous smile or strong eye-contact.
6. But, It Could Be Better.
Look, there’s nothing wrong with reciprocating a flirt by saying, “You’re not so bad yourself.” But, is it the best compliment you could receive or give? No! If someone really likes you, they’ll give you a much more meaningful compliment that makes you feel special. So, if someone says you’re not so bad yourself, maybe you shouldn’t tell everyone in your group chat that the person’s into you ’cause the jury’s still out on if he likes you. Sorry.
7. It Could Be A Shy Way Of Showing Interest.
Before slicing apart these confusing words, consider who’s saying them. Let’s say you’re crushing on a really shy, introverted guy. You pluck up the courage (after two tequila shots) to tell him that he’s fine and he says, “You’re not so bad yourself.” In this case, you can squeeze some interest from his words ’cause they probably mean 10 times more than if a confident guy had said them. Know what I mean? It’s convenient for a shy guy to show interest by saying these words – he cleverly doesn’t have to put himself out there by saying he likes you.
8. But, It Can Also Be Negative.
Ever felt a bit strange when someone said, “You’re not so bad yourself” after you complimented them? Maybe you felt a bit awkward, as though you weren’t 100 percent sure if the comment was positive or negative. You’re not alone. This is where body language cues come in to clear up the confusion, yet again. So, for example, if you compliment a friend’s style and she says, “You’re not so bad yourself” but she gives you a once-over with her eyes while saying it or her tone is sarcastic, then it’s ick.
9. Perhaps “Thank You” Would Be Better.
I reckon if you’re not going to reply to the person who’s giving you a compliment with a genuine, meaningful one about them, then maybe saying “Thank you” is the better route to take than “You’re not so bad yourself.” Look, it prevents any confusion because it’s so clear that it’s refreshing! Let’s keep things simple, especially when feelings are involved, m’kay? And next time, when someone you like tells you how beautiful your eyes are, give them something to work with instead of relying on confusing phrases that seem to say something but don’t really. We don’t need that!
