To Any Woman Out There Who’s Been Used For Her Body

To Any Woman Out There Who’s Been Used For Her Body ©iStock/PeopleImages

He told you he wanted something real, but really, all he wanted was a one-night stand. It’s a story that too many women are able to tell. If you’ve ever been used for your body, here’s what you need to know:

  1. Not all men are scumbags. Some of them are more interested in your brain than your boobs. Some of them will actually stick around to cuddle with you after they come. Some of them will make you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, even when you’re fully clothed.
  2. He’s the real problem. Don’t ask yourself what you’ve done wrong, because he’s the one who screwed up. He’s either afraid of how hot you are, afraid of being whipped, or afraid of something real. He’s the one with the issues, not you.
  3. You’re not an object. Don’t act like his behavior was normal. You’re not a toy that men can play with, and then toss aside when they get bored. You’re a valuable human being, and you should be treated as such.
  4. Casual intimacy isn’t a sin. Don’t feel like your body is tainted, just because some douchebag tricked you into sleeping with him. It doesn’t matter how many men have run their hands across your skin. You’re still the same beautiful person.
  5. You’re not an idiot. Men can be manipulative, so don’t feel like a fool for believing that he actually liked you. It happens to everyone. You wouldn’t have been able to see his betrayal coming.
  6. You don’t need to sleep with someone to make them like you. If you’ve been used for your body again and again and again, then you might be fooled into believing that your body is the only thing you have to offer. Of course, that’s not true. You’re so much more than your body, which is why you don’t have to agree to sleep with a guy in order to get him to like you.
  7. Don’t hate on love-making. You shouldn’t see it as a game for men, and a chore for women. It’s meant to be an intimate experience to bring two people closer together. When you find the right man, you’ll realize how magical and meaningful it can be.
  8. Be proud of your body. He didn’t appreciate your beautiful brain or sense of humor, but at least he appreciated your body. You’re hot. That’s why he was willing to lie, steal, and cheat in order to get you into bed.
  9. Don’t make love if you don’t want to. If you’re making love with him in the hopes of getting him to settle down, rethink your plan. You should only sleep with him if it’s what you actually want to do. Otherwise, you could easily get screwed over again.
  10. You’d make a great girlfriend. He only wanted you for your body, but that doesn’t mean it’s the only thing you’re good for. If a man gave you a chance, you’d be the best girlfriend he ever had.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.