Let’s get this out of the way: I’m petty as hell. If I’m feeling wronged by someone in any way (and trust me, I’m always feeling wronged), I will do everything in my power to bring that person down with me. A lot of people shame this behavior, but I honestly see nothing wrong with it as long as you are truly just being petty and not burning down someone’s house. I’m proud to be petty and I think more people should be instead of trying to deny it.
- Everyone else is, too. Being petty is pretty commonplace these days, though it’s mostly talked about in regards to romantic relationships. Your boyfriend played you and you played him right back. Beyonce dropped a whole album to make up for Jay-Z’s affair (or so they want us to think). Sure, that can be petty, but so can slowing down your car when someone is trying to tailgate. If you can honestly say you’ve never done anything solely to get underneath someone else’s skin, congratulations because…
- There’s no prize for taking the high road. Other people will treat you like crap. You can try to take the high road or be the better person, but why should you? Sure, you’ll go to bed knowing you were the bigger person, but what does that get you at the end of the day? Pettiness is harmless and it’s fun to watch someone squirm for a minute.
- The world is cruel and so are you. The world is a cold place. From the time I was a little girl, my mother reinforced the simple mantra, “Life sucks and then you die.” The world doesn’t care about what your plans are and it will be problematic regardless. You can be problematic too. Being petty is simply a coping mechanism and I’ll admit…
- It’s cathartic as hell. Like the world, people are losers. Day after day, you deal with other people wronging you. Being petty is a way to get back at the losers without causing a scene. Let them cause the scenes. Maybe you wash all of your dishes but leave your roommate’s in the sink or maybe you leave someone on read, you’re bound to feel a little better about yourself and no one else needs to know.
- It’s empowering. Let’s go back to leaving people on read. I’m not going to leave someone on read if they’re being an upstanding member of society. If I leave someone on read, they’ve obviously done something to piss me off. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” and since I started being petty, I’ve found that to be true. My little gestures make me feel like I have some semblance of control in a crappy situation.
- Petty people get stuff done. Petty people get a bad reputation, but they get stuff done. In my case, I usually end up being a doormat to everyone in my life. I’m too anxious to flat out tell someone I’m upset about something so I let my actions do the talking. My general rule is to ask someone to do something (or stop doing something) once, remind them once, and then I change the Wi-Fi password.