While sex isn’t the be-all, end-all of a relationship, it’s certainly an important part. Sexual satisfaction is high priority for many of us, so it’s only natural to wonder how a guy will be in bed before you actually sleep with him. While there’s no way to know for sure, here are some subtle giveaways that he’ll be a great lover.
He’s confident, not cocky.
A man who’s good in bed doesn’t have to do anything to overcompensate because he knows he’s already got it goin’ on. Cocky guys act as such because they’re trying to prove something in order to get a woman into bed. Guys who already know they’re good in bed won’t have to try so hard in their advances. If he carries himself confidently but with a bit of humility – in how he walks, talks, and holds himself – but doesn’t overdo the arrogance, he’s probably pretty good in the sack.
He pays attention.
We all know a guy who sucked in bed just because he couldn’t care less about your experience. He didn’t even know what you wanted, if you were enjoying yourself, your body’s signals, or if you even got off! A guy who’s attentive during sex is a guy who’s attentive in his every day too. He’ll be observant of his surroundings and most importantly, of you. He’ll ask you questions about yourself and be genuinely interested in your answers. He’ll notice physical aspects of you and shower you in compliments. If he’s an attentive guy, you can make a good bet on him.
He’s assertive and not afraid to go after what he wants.
Don’t get this twisted with someone who’s pushy or too over the top. You’ll want to look for guys who can be assertive and aggressive not in their advances, but in their actions outside of their flirtations. Men like that will be able to take charge and rock your world when you get to the bedroom, especially if you’re more submissive in bed. I was once with a guy who was quick to push my hand away and light my cigarette for me, and he ended up being a great lay. Guys who are good in bed know what they want.
He displays great body language.
Guys who know what to do with their body (and yours) in bed will know what body language to use outside of the bedroom too. Look for good eye contact, good posture, eyebrow flashes, tousling his hair, and body positioned toward you to hold your attention and show you’re holding his. If a guy’s body language is attractive to you, you’ll probably like what that body can do behind closed doors too.
He’s a good dancer.
Again, guys who know what to do with their bodies in bed will know what to do with their bodies in any setting. This definitely translates to the dance floor, as weird as that sounds. Dancing together can also give you clues as to how your bodies jive with one another in general and you’ll be able to tell how sensual he can get – not to mention, you could just get an idea of what he’s packing down there if you’re dancing close enough).
Weird things happen in bed sometimes. Odd noises, water breaks, not being able to bend that way – these are all things that he should be familiar with and not feel awkward about. Especially if you’re down for experimentation, this guy has to know not to judge any weird happenings during sex. If he’s used to these kinds of things, he should be pretty open and non-judgmental in any wake of life. It’s definitely a good sign if your guy seems ultra-accepting.
He uses his hands in a way that makes you think he’s, uh, good at using them.
Pay attention to his hands. Notice how he moves them when he talks, how he holds the steering wheel, or how he touches you generally. See how his touch makes you feel when he’s doing things like holding your hand, putting his hand on your leg or back, or massaging your shoulders. A guy who knows how to touch you during sex will know how to make you feel good with his hands in other ways.
He’s considerate of what you want and how you feel.
He needs to know what your desires are and what’s making you feel good. If he cares about these things while you’re out on a date, he’ll care when you head to the bedroom later. While you’re out, he’ll care if you’re having fun, if you’re feeling alright, and what it is you want to do. Later, he’ll be able to please you in the exact same fashion.
He makes you feel comfortable.
This one is key, as you need someone who makes you feel comfortable and really cares that you are. If you feel comfortable around him, rest assured he will make you feel comfortable while you’re doing the deed as well. The worst is a man who pushes boundaries, but this kind of man will make sure not to.
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