The Girls That Get The Guys — 10 Things They Do Differently

The most desirable women are usually the ones who aren’t actually trying to be. Why? Because these kinds of women tend to be strong ones who don’t put up with a lot of crap — not only do guys find that attractive but it’s just a great way to be. If you want to be one of those girls that get the guys, here are some things that set these kinds of women apart.

1. They’re hard to get.

That doesn’t mean they play games — it just means they’re actually hard to get. They don’t just fall for any cute guy who flirts with them. They make a guy work for it because they know they have options. The girls that get the guys are so successful because they know that if one guy’s not up to scratch, there are a million others who would love to take his place.

2. They believe in love.

Cynicism is natural — after all, it’s hard not to be a little cynical after having been single for a while — but the strongest women maintain optimism… They keep the romantic in themselves alive.  Think about it — if you don’t expect much from men or love, you’ll be more willing to settle for crap because that’s all you think exists. But if you think you deserve real goodness and believe a great guy is out there for you, you’ll be less likely to waste time on the jerks.

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4. They don’t put up with BS or do denial.

Guys play all sorts of games — all’s fair in love and war — but the most independent women keep themselves in check. They don’t lie to themselves about what’s going on. They listen to their guts and tell themselves the truth. If a guy doesn’t seem to be taking their happiness seriously, they bounce.

5. They don’t negotiate when it comes to the basics.

There are things we should compromise on with a guy — our place or his, missionary vs. cowgirl, rom-com vs. action flick — but there are other things that should never be up for debate such as feeling heard, valued, supported, equal, and safe. Independent women understand this and don’t give in when it comes to things that are critical.

6. They’re not afraid to be alone.

Independent women don’t need someone to complete them because they already complete themselves. Having a full life — which includes great girlfriends, a career that matters, and various hobbies and passions — is a recipe for happiness. It’s also a recipe for finding great love because, when you’re not scared to be on your own, you’re more willing to walk away from bad guys.

7. They focus on their strengths, not their weaknesses.

Strong women have insecurities like the rest of us but they don’t let them define them or their opportunities. Although insecurity is natural, we all have to do our best to silence those useless, negative thoughts that keep us down. After all, the more you behave like a desirable woman, the more men will treat you like one.

8. They know what they want.

There’s something sexy about women who are clear in their heads about what they want. That takes time and effort to figure out, not to mention a certain strength of character to stick to it and not compromise or lower their standards. Girls who get the guys have a strong grasp on their needs and desires, and that’s hot.

9. They know they’re a catch.

It’s so easy to start doubting yourself when you’re dating someone who doesn’t appreciate you or treats you badly. However, the girls that get the guys are the ones that have such a strong sense of self that they never for one-second question their own worthiness. They know what they have to offer and what they bring to the table; they’re not lead by insecurity or an inferiority complex.

10. They’re hopeful but never desperate.

The women who are most successful in love are ones who are open and accessible when it comes to love but never desperate for it. They don’t do clingy; they don’t lose their minds if a guy doesn’t text them back in five minutes, they don’t need him to tell them how much he likes them every five minutes, and if a guy starts pulling away, they’re certainly not wasting time trying to reel him back in. See ya later, dude.

11. They truly love their lives.

Independent women aren’t just unafraid to be alone, they actually relish it at times because they’ve spent years creating a life they love to live. They understand that relationships are a bonus, not a requirement, and they know exactly how to fulfill their own needs. There’s nothing sexier than women who don’t need men at all. If a guy wants to have a place in their life, he’ll have to work for it, and all guys love a challenge.

Halle Kaye is the author of the insightful, inspirational and hilarious dating guide for women, "Maybe He's Just an Asshole: Ditch Denial, Embrace Your Worth, and Find True Love!"