Mindfulness is the act of being aware. It’s being present with the here and now. It has a plethora of benefits and can have some serious ones when it comes to dating. Mindfulness can save you from getting into those toxic relationships, or at the very least it can keep you from staying in them. Here’s how mindfulness can save you:
- You work through your baggage. In practicing mindfulness you’re tapping into the truth of your experience. You’re taking the temperature of what’s going on. It’s nearly impossible to be honest with yourself in this way while also keeping baggage stuffed up in a suitcase. Instead, you’re forced to work through it. This process inevitably makes you a healthier person, making it harder for you to put up with other people’s crap.
- You value yourself enough to demand respect. Whether you’re sitting in meditation or you’re just paying attention to your breath as you go through the day, you’re developing a relationship with yourself. This relationship will manifest in ways that keep you acting positively towards yourself. You’ll value who you are, so you’ll demand respect from others. This automatically weeds out those who can’t give you what you need.
- You have a cleaner read on your gut or intuition. Without mindfulness, it’s very hard to hear what your intuition is saying. The message is muddled and you can’t tell left from right. You may feel signs but you aren’t sure what they’re saying. On the other hand, when you’ve been practicing, then you’re much better able to read what your gut is saying. You can hone in on its messages.
- You have a gut that tells you “NO” and “YES.” That intuition of yours clearly tells you when something is a “no” and when something is a “yes. Usually, the “no” is louder, so it’s easier to hear. When you’ve become accustomed to tuning into the mind, body, and spirit, it’s a true guide. Sometimes a “yes” is a bit quieter. Although, some other times it screams. Regardless of the volume, you can often hear the right answer if you listen.
- You can address issues kindly. You don’t have to freak out when something goes wrong because your head’s in the right place. You react from a place of love most of the time. Not all the time, you’re not perfect, but much of the time! You can address issues with kindness, knowing that the other person is a human being, too. This keeps you from getting involved with toxic people because you’ll learn to respect the same in return.
- You have a sense of your limits. You know when something is too much, like if someone shows that they’re toxic then you have an idea of what you won’t tolerate. You have a very low-threshold for people bothering you, you aren’t willing to put up with crap. This is a sign of a bold and mindful person.
- You can set boundaries clearly. Boundary setting sounds scary to many, but you can do it with grace. When something isn’t sitting well with you, you’re able to speak your mind and set that boundary. You can do it clearly and effectively, in a way that minimizes hurting others.
- You have greater access to acceptance. Acceptance is crucial; it can be used in just about every situation. An example is you meeting someone, having all these expectations, then having it not turn out as you wanted. You could be desperately upset about this, or you could have acceptance around the situation. You’d have greater access to this because you’re already regularly practicing tapping into the truth.
- You know what your values are. You hold your values near and dear to you. They’re right at the forefront of your mind. As a result of this, it’s very hard to be with someone who goes against any values you have or doesn’t share the same ones.
- You aren’t beating yourself up. One of the ways to stay in a loop with a toxic relationship is to beat yourself down thinking you made the wrong decision and you’re bad. This sort of thinking will just land you back in the hands of the toxic person in your life. Instead, mindfulness can help because when you’re practicing you aren’t beating yourself up so much. You’re much gentler.
