If He’s Doing These Things, He Doesn’t Want Love — He Just Wants To Get Laid

When you really like a guy, it’s tempting to take everything he says at face value. He might try to convince you that he wants something serious with you. However, if he does any of these things, he doesn’t want love. Chances are, he’s only with you because he likes having sex on tap.

  1. He wants to hook up instead of going out. For a while there, you really thought he was interested in you. He threw on the charm and wanted to chat with you all the time. But after you realized he never wanted to go on actual dates with you, you figured out he was just looking for sex. Spending time in the same room doesn’t make it an actual date, and he’s a jerk for pretending otherwise.
  2. His compliments are cheapA guy who only wants to sleep with you tends to focus solely on your physical traits. He never actually tells you something great about your personality or mind. It’s only sexual with him.
  3. He can’t hold a real conversation. Chances are he’d hold an erection for longer than he’d be able to have a real conversation with you. He always steers the chat onto sexual topics and avoids talking about things that actually matter.
  4. He doesn’t put effort into your time together. If he were really into you, he’d invest time into you and make you feel special by taking you on romantic dates. But he’d rather invite you over to his place rather than going to see a movie or doing anything else that would require more effort than having sex with you.
  5. He makes you feel like a piece of meat. Sexting with your partner can be really hot, but not if the guy’s only after sex. A guy who’s constantly asking for nudes or avoiding anything more in-depth than what he’d like you to do to him later — he might also make you feel like you’re not worth any more to him than your ability to give him an orgasm.
  6. He’s pushy about spending a weekend away with you. This is one of the things he’ll do to make you think that he sees you as GF potential. You might think that he wouldn’t be inviting you to go away with him if he didn’t want to date you, but what he’s really looking for here is an easy way to have an entire weekend dedicated to getting laid. Unless he has specific plans he’s told you about, don’t get excited about this being anything more than an extended sexcapade.
  7. He’s always too busy to go out, but never too busy for sex. When you suggest hanging out and doing something with your clothes on, he always has something else going on. But he’d drop everything if you texted him that you were waiting for him in your lingerie. He’s not actually busy — he just has messed-up priorities.
  8. He goes for long periods without contact. There are times when you won’t hear from him for days or weeks. If you really like him, it might be easy for you to accept whatever BS excuse he comes up with, but all he’s doing is keeping you on a string so he can cast you out when he’s bored with you and pull you back when he’s horny.
  9. His texts scream that he’s lonely or horny. Yeah, he doesn’t want love. He has the tendency to text you late at night or when he wants to know “what’s up?” But then he disappears halfway into the conversation when it’s clear that you’re not going over to his place. When you try to text him during the day, he’s nowhere to be found. He knows when to contact you because it’s convenient for his libido.
  10. He tries to get your attention the minute you step away. He wants to know that he has you as a romantic option if he needs you. So, the minute you pull away and stop giving him attention, he increases his efforts. He’ll send you texts and call you, telling you he misses you. He’s in love with the chase, but don’t let it fool you — the only thing he’s missing is the chance to hook up.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.