A loveless relationship may mimic one going through “tough times” or a “rough patch,” but in this case, there’s very little chance of bouncing back. Once the love is gone, you should be too—especially if these things are happening.
Communication is bland. Sure, you guys talk to one another but what are you really talking about? Are you talking about goals, your future together, the promotion you’re going for at work, or how the garbage needs to be taken out? The quality of conversation going downhill is usually the first sign of a loveless relationship and while it may not seem like a major issue at first, it can quickly spiral into disaster.
Sex isn’t what it used to be. When it actually happens, it’s just not fun anymore. In fact, it’s pretty much a chore. You used to be hot and heavy for each other and while you know that changes over time, you also know you shouldn’t dread getting close to your partner. When the intimacy becomes nonexistent, the relationship isn’t far behind it.
Date night is scarce. This includes any type of quality time outside of your respective houses. Being in a loveless relationship means the urge to be around one another is not as strong as it once was. Spending quality time together is crucial for any relationship and only confirms how you feel about being in each other’s presence. Loveless relationships tend to fall short in this category.
You constantly question the relationship. Is this what you really want? Is this the person you’re supposed to end up with? Some doubt is normal periodically in any relationship, but it shouldn’t be a constant worry. In a loveless relationship, you usually know deep down that something is missing, which may cause you to question the relationship more than normal. You know something isn’t right but you just can’t put your finger on it.
There’s no PDA. Not even holding hands. Sure, PDA isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but when you go from making out in the movie theater to walking on opposite sides of the sidewalk, something is definitely off. Little displays of affection here and there can make you feel loved and when you stop receiving that, things take a turn for the worse.
Compromise has gone out the window. When you’re in a loving relationship, compromise is needed to keep things afloat. Everything isn’t always going to go your way, so it’s imperative to meet in the middle. This doesn’t happen anymore when the love is gone. Instead, there’s a push and pull of who’s going to get their way and that doesn’t work for any relationship.
You never argue. I’m not saying you should be fighting like cats and dogs every single day, but disagreements here and there are healthy for a relationship. It shows that there are still feelings attached to the relationship and that you both still care. When things are constantly being swept under the rug, it indicates you’re checked out and would rather ignore the inevitable.
Your partner is last on your list of priorities. Work, friends, family, even your social life—all of these come before your partner. Every opportunity you have to escape the relationship is pounced on. You continue to make time for everything else but your partner and their needs. The more distance created between you and your partner only deepens the apparent disconnect.
There’s no effort. Either one or both of you has given up in the relationship. When you start to feel like there’s no effort being put in, it starts to create a hopeless feeling and even leads to resentment. It’s hard to come back from these type of feelings because they’re typically built up over a long period of time. Once the effort stops, it’s almost like a line being drawn in the sand.
You can easily imagine life without your partner. You start to wonder more and more what life would be like with someone else, how it would feel to get the love you crave and wish you could receive from your significant other. Feelings like these can lead to emotional or even physical betrayal and it’s best to address them head-on. The worse thing you can do is get comfortable in a relationship that doesn’t love you back.
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