If A Man Displays Any Of These 16 Characteristics, He’s Probably Not As Nice As He Seems

You’ve met a new guy and he seems cool and charming — that is until you start noticing some small comments and behaviors that don’t sit well in your gut. To be sure of what you’re dealing with so you don’t waste your time on him, here are 16 characteristics that show you a guy’s not a nice person. Don’t let him fool you!

1. He’s Not Happy For His Best Friend.

When he talks about his friend’s success, this guy doesn’t seem too happy for his friend. He puts his friend down or makes sarcastic comments behind his back even though he’s supposed to be his biggest supporter. Is he jealous or just a hater? It’s hard to know, but either way, he’s not very nice.

2. He Laughs At Your Bad Day.

You tell the guy that your heel broke halfway during a presentation or your phone died and instead of sympathizing, he does something you weren’t expecting: he laughs at you. If they lack empathy, run! There’s nothing nice about someone who takes joy in other people’s misery.

3. He Lies About Silly Things.

woman being blunt and overbearing

It’s confusing if a guy lies to you about something really small like what he ate for dinner or where he went on vacation last year. This can be a sign you’re dealing with a chronic liar, and it definitely requires more investigation. A willingness to fib about stuff that doesn’t even matter indicates he’s probably happy to twist the truth on the big things too. (By the way, if you want to meet guys who lack the qualities on this list, check out our sister site, Sweetn. They can help you do a 180 in your love life in just a few weeks!)

4. He “Jokingly” Puts You Down.

The guy seems to always find an opportunity to tease you in a way that’s not funny or he criticizes you. He might be critical about your outfit, hairstyle, or how you hold your fork when eating. It’s like everything you do is a chance for him to feel like a comedian, but his jokes aren’t landing.

5. He Breaks His Word.

He might apologize profusely for ditching your plans again, but he tends to do this regularly. His word is supposed to be his bond, but in reality, it doesn’t actually mean much of anything. If he can’t keep his word on little things, he’s going to continue disappointing you.

6. He Thinks He’s All That.

smiling guy talking on phone

A guy who’s not kind might be arrogant and entitled. He walks through life thinking he’s so amazing, building himself up like his own PR person, while thinking he’s better than everyone else. He doesn’t see you as his equal, and that’s a huge problem. The last thing you need is a guy who belittles you at every turn.

7. He Acts Like A Victim.

guy sitting on couch in apartment

He doesn’t take responsibility for his actions. Instead, he points the finger at everyone else in his life and makes it out like the world is out to get him. It’s quite childish. If you stick with him, he’ll be someone who never owns up to his mistakes or makes positive changes in his life.

8. He’s Against Commitment.

When he talks about relationships, he never says anything positive. He might make jokes about how relationships and marriages suck, especially when you talk about your long-term relationship goals. If that’s how he really feels, then why is he with you? Is he wasting your time?

9. He Loses His Cool.

Frequent angry outbursts can be scary — and they’re a sign he’s dealing with much deeper issues. The bottom line is that he can’t control his emotions, and that’s a huge red flag. You don’t want to deal with someone who’s emotionally immature.

10. He’s Jealous About Small Things.

You can tell the guy’s bad news if he gets jealous about things that are no big deal at all. He might get jealous when you mention your friend sent you a funny cat meme or your boss gave you extra time to work on a project. It’s like he suspects everyone who’s nice to you of wanting to be with you.

11. He Never Apologizes.

If you catch him doing something that’s upsetting and he laughs it off or brushes your feelings, he’s not a good person. He lacks humility and kindness, not to mention the emotional maturity it takes to be accountable for his actions and fess up when he messes up.

12. He’s Mean To His Family.

You don’t even know the guy and he’s quick to tell you how bad his family is. There could be real issues he’s dealing with, but he’s bringing drama and could be showing you that he’s actually the toxic one in his family.

13. He Doesn’t Pay Attention.

When you try to talk to him about your day or friends, he seems like he’s totally zoned out or he keeps checking his watch. How rude! However, he comes alive when he gets to talk about himself. Selfish, much?

14. He Talks About Other Women.

If he talks about other women, whether it’s his ex-girlfriend or a woman he works with who he clearly likes as more than a friend, he might be doing this to make you feel bad about yourself. For example, he might say, “Oh, my ex always loved my massages” or “Women think I’m awesome.” What’s his deal?

15. He’s Keeping You A Secret.

Although it takes time to feel ready to introduce someone to your family and friends, they should at least know about you. If he only meets you for dates across town or he changes the subject when you say you’d love to hear more about his friends, he could be compartmentalizing his life.

16. He Scrutinizes The Bill.

When you get the bill after having dinner, does he always scrutinize it so he only pays for the items he’s ordered? He won’t pay for your drinks or dinner, or even go halfies on the amount. This is so petty!

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Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.
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