An overbearing person is someone who tries to get everyone to fall in line with what they want. Ugh, selfishness alert! It’s always about them and what they want, without much regard for other people. If you find yourself dealing with an overbearing family member, friend, or partner, it’s infuriating. Here are 12 traits of an overbearing person and how you can deal with them effectively so they don’t run you into the ground.
1. They Speak Over You.
Someone who’s overbearing will dominate conversations. They’ll interrupt you and speak louder so their voice is the one that’s heard. It usually feels like you need a loudspeaker just to express an opinion. The best way to deal is to stay calm and tell them that you’re not being heard, ’cause they might not even realize their behavior’s so hectic.
2. They Don’t Listen.
When you get some of the spotlight and can finally speak, the person might look blank or bored, so they’re not even listening to you! Argh. Instead of letting it slide, ask them something like, “Are you not interested in this?” or “Sorry, am I boring you with this topic?” and see what they say. Hopefully, bringing the issue to light will make them change their crappy behavior.
3. They Sulk When They Can’t Hog The Spotlight.
If you’ve managed to steal the spotlight from an overbearing person, they might sulk or become quiet because they don’t like not having all the attention. Ugh. Communicate with the person to ask them why they feel the need to have so much attention. This can help you to identify their issues, such as if they’re insecure, and will make them see how their behavior affects others. They’ve totally missed that ’cause they’re stuck in their head so much!
4. They’re Extremely Inflexible.
Overbearing people want to do things their way. They don’t have open-mindedness to consider other people’s thoughts or ideas. It’s frustrating, but you can gently tell them that there are other ways of doing things. But, don’t let their negativity get to you. Overbearing people are super-negative, so being positive will help you stand your ground in their company. (BTW, if you find yourself being inflexible, especially when it comes to dating, give our sister site, Sweetn, a visit. They have some game-changing tips and tricks to completely overcome your limiting beliefs and behaviors to change your love life for good.)
5. They Step Into Your Personal Space.
Overbearing people will walk all over your boundaries, such as by entering your personal space. They might stand really close to you when they speak to you, or point at you in a way that feels intimidating, and it’s done to make you feel that they’re dominant. Yikes. To deal with them, say something like, “Could you step back? You’re in my space a bit too much than is comfortable for me.”
6. They Give You Unsolicited Advice.
You could be talking to an overbearing person and the next thing you know, they’ll be telling you what to do with your life – even though you didn’t ask them for advice! Ugh. Using humor is a good way to make them stop, so you could say something like, “Thanks for your advice, even though I never asked you for it.” Or, excuse yourself from the conversation if you feel you’re going to blow up.
7. They Try To Bully You.
Overbearing people will try to control other people and their situation. So, it’s not a stretch to say they’ll end up bullying you. They might roll their eyes when you express an opinion that conflicts with theirs, or they might criticize you for your choices to try to belittle you. Don’t stand for this! Stay calm and don’t show you’re hurt – bullies love that. But, be clear about how their comments make you feel.
8. They Get Heated When They Don’t Get Their Way.
When things don’t go the way an overbearing person wants it to, they might lose their cool and throw a tantrum. Yikes. It can be difficult to witness this, but sometimes giving them their space is the best way to deal. Why take on the drama? You really don’t need it. If they’re getting heated during a fight with you, give them space and regroup when they’ve calmed down.
9. They Love Talking About Themselves.
During conversation, an overbearing person will love stealing the spotlight. They’ll try to steer all conversation topics back to them. So, if you mention you recently went to Greece, they’ll tell you about their trip. Or, if you mention you achieved a goal, they’ll brag about their success. Ugh. It’s always a competition with them and they have to try to one-up with you with better stories.
10. They Don’t Ask You Questions.
When chatting to an overbearing person, don’t expect to have a two-way conversation. They want to talk about themselves and so they’ll expect you to ask them questions but they won’t return the favor. So dodgy. It’s like they don’t even care about what you’ve got to say because it’s all about them. Sigh. Let them know that you feel ignored or like they don’t care about you.
11. They Don’t Give You Space.
Someone who’s overbearing doesn’t respect your space. So, when you want to be alone, they’ll come talk to you if they have to get something off their mind. It’s always about what they need. A good way to deal with this is to express why time alone is important for you and express yourself clearly so they understand. Set a time when you can sit with them and give them your undivided attention, so they know you’re not just pushing them aside.
12. They Don’t Respect Your Time.
An overbearing person lacks consideration for others. So, they won’t care that you’re on your way to an important meeting or have to make a phone call – they’ll continue talking to you and stealing your time. It’s so infuriating! When you find yourself in this situation, raise a hand and tell them, “I’m going now” so they know they have to stop talking. Don’t stick around as this will make them think they can continue.
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