Great guys may seem like mythological creatures but while they’re rare, they definitely exist. All the liars, players, and otherwise toxic men you date are just bumps in the road to finding a good one. Here’s how you know you’ve found one—YOUR one.
There’s no game playing. No weeks of him going missing, no waiting to get a text back, and the relationship flows naturally. It’s not always easy (love never is), but it works. It’s not forced. You’re not bending pieces until they fit. The right guy has the same goals in mind as you and game playing isn’t going to help reach them. You can trust him. Trust is such a rarity these days, but he’ll never give you reason to doubt him.
You feel safe with him. The world can be cold but the right guy can be your safe place. A man is instinctively protective of those he loves. “The One” makes it his priority to make sure no one or thing hurts you, unlike the jerks before who made you feel vulnerable and sometimes ashamed. No place feels safer than wrapped up in his arms.
You can rely on him when things get tough. It’s not easy to find someone who has your back no matter what—most guys can barely put in the effort to text you back. Finding the right partner is finding someone who WANTS to be there for you. He wants to make sure you’re safe and well taken care of. He’s that ride or die guy for you. Life becomes easier with a good partner by your side, and sometimes, it can literally save your life.
You never feel alone. You see yourself with him forever. You don’t picture lonely Christmas Eves sharing old Chinese food with your cat. You have someone by your side with whom you can face the world. No matter what life brings to you, you know you can get through it with him by your side. Most importantly, you never have to doubt that he’s by your side and in your corner. He proves it over and over again.
He keeps you balanced. He matches, loves, and respects your fire while making sure you don’t burn out. On the hard days, he’s there to lift you up. On the great days, he’s ready to catch you in case you fall. If you’re nervous, he’s your serenity and if you’re feeling wild he’s there to cheer you on. The right relationship keeps you balanced so you never fall too hard or fly too close to the sun.
He boosts your confidence. He doesn’t nitpick your imperfections to bring you down. Actually, he teaches you to LOVE your imperfections just as he does. He doesn’t call you names or criticize you in subtle or overt ways. Instead, he reminds you every day in hundreds of different ways that you’re beautiful. He makes you feel like you can take any challenge head-on. His focus is to build you up, not tear you down. Life is way easier with a support system to fall back on.
You’re finally able to let your guard down. No spending three hours trying to think of witty one-liners. No Photoshop. No secrets or lies or embellishments. This relationship is past all that because you impress him for who you are and not who you feel like you have to pretend to be. You can truly be the rawest version of yourself and be loved for it. There’s nothing more liberating than being truly loved for who you are.
You don’t fight dirty. There’s a difference between disagreeing, arguing, and actually FIGHTING. You don’t always have to agree, and there are times you make each other mad and step on each other’s toes because you’re two totally different people. However, when you argue, you don’t fight dirty. You communicate productively because you both have the same goal in mind—a happy relationship and a future together.
He’s your best friend. You want him around for everything and everything is better with him by your side. If something great happens, he’s the first person you want to share it with. If something terrible happens, he’s the person you need by your side to get you through. It’s more than just a physical relationship—hell, it’s even more than an emotional relationship. He just GETS you like only a best friend would.
Home becomes a person. You could move halfway across the country with him and still feel like you’re home. You can be on an entirely different planet and feel OK because he’s there with you. You know what they say—”home is where the heart is”—and this relationship helps you realize how true that saying is.
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