How To Deal With Dating Someone Better Looking Than You

Young couple looking at a smart phone outdoors in the city

If you’re dating someone more attractive than you, it might feel like part ego boost, part insecure fest. Real talk here: feeling less attractive than your partner is difficult. You might struggle with a lack of confidence when you’re around others, and everyone keeps staring at your partner. Yikes. Here are 10 ways to deal with the situation and not let looks become a problem.

1. Embrace Your Charms

Young couple looking at a smart phone outdoors in the city

Instead of focusing too much on how gorgeous your partner is, stop and take in your positive traits. Everything that makes you unique is something worth celebrating. Maybe you don’t have Hollywood good looks, but you have a memorable face that sets you apart from the crowd and makes you more attractive. Make a list of what you like about yourself and what others have said is beautiful about you.

2. Remember Beauty Is Subjective

Not everyone will have the same ideas of what makes someone beautiful. That’s why sometimes the person you think is the hottest thing to walk the planet is given a “meh” rating by your friends. So, don’t get caught up thinking that the world will adore your partner – not everyone will think they’re stunning. Similarly, not everyone will think you’re not attractive.

3. Look Beyond the Surface

Don’t get caught up in prioritizing physical attractiveness too much because it’s a dead-end. It’ll only take you so far in dating. Think about what’s beneath the surface. What are your amazing personality traits? What about your partner? Bear these in mind because they matter much more than how one looks, and they will ensure you stay together for longer.

4. Focus On Your Relationship

couple cuddling on picnic blanket

What other people think about you and your partner really doesn’t matter. The relationship is about you, so it’s not worth damaging it because you feel jealous or insecure. Focus on what your relationship has to offer, what value it brings to your life, and the amazing future you and your partner will have together. Yes, people might look at your partner a lot, which can be upsetting, but it shouldn’t bother you.

5. Boost Your Self-Confidence

If you’re feeling low because you feel insecure around your partner when you’re in public together, there are things you can do to improve your self-confidence. Celebrate your achievements, pursue interests that make you feel good, and use positive mantras to remind yourself of why you’re great and worthy. These can help you to boost your self-validation and make you feel happier.

6. Silence Your Inner Critic

woman holding phone looking out window

It’s easy for negative self-talk to hog the spotlight, but nip those thoughts in the bud so they don’t get in the way of your relationship. Replace negative thoughts about your appearance with positive ones. Instead of saying, “I look ugly,” tell yourself, “I look beautiful in my own way.” The trick is to focus on what makes you unique. Avoid the mirror altogether on bad days – don’t let a bad mood warp how you see yourself.

7. Accentuate Your Attractiveness

hipster woman with glasses smiling

While you don’t want to get too obsessed with how you look, it can be a nice confidence boost to bring to light your most attractive features. Everyone has them, so don’t hide yours from the world. You could also think of how you can improve your looks so you feel pretty, confident, and happy within yourself. Maybe a change of hair color or clothing style can achieve this.

8. Dig Into Your Insecurities

the one that got away

The issue of your partner being more attractive than you is a trigger for a deeper issue that’s going on within you. So, dig deeper into why you’re feeling insecure. Maybe you never felt beautiful as a child, or you’ve always been criticized, and it’s messed with your overall confidence. By dealing with these issues, you can get to the bottom of them and eliminate them, so you grow from the experience.

9. Slay Self-Doubt

Young woman sat on wall alone

If your partner is more attractive than you, you might worry that this could cause them to walk away from the relationship. Remind yourself that if the relationship does hit a dead-end, it’s not because of how you look but because of other issues. Deal with your trust issues so you don’t let your insecurities stand in the way of a healthy relationship.

10. Celebrate Having a Hot Partner

couple about to kiss on date outdoors

Be a supportive partner by celebrating your partner’s attractiveness. Although you don’t want to make them feel like they’re just arm candy, feel good about people checking them out when you’re together. This is healthier than allowing their gaze to make you feel moody or insecure, which can make your partner feel weird. Oh, and remember, your partner’s hot, but they chose to be with you. That’s also worth feeling good about!