I’m Not Clingy, I’m Just Putting Effort Into The Relationship

I’m not sure why everyone thinks being independent from your guy and being clingy are two distinct sides of a black and white cookie. It’s perfectly reasonable to be somewhere in the middle, showing your guy you care while still giving him (and yourself) space to breathe. I’m not uber-clingy, I’m just giving my guy my all, and I don’t care what anyone thinks about it.

Love languages are a real thing.

Scientists have developed a simple online test that tells you your dominant love language based on a serious of questions. It may not be foolproof, but if you ask me, it’s totally legit. Some people crave validation or touch while others express how they feel through gift giving or doing acts of service together, and your dominant language translates into how you act in a relationship. My love language is touch and affection, and showing that to my guy doesn’t make me a stage five clinger.

I’m perfectly capable of being on my own.

My attachment to my boyfriend and desire to be around him all the time don’t mean I need him. I’m incredibly independent and I know that my role as girlfriend doesn’t define me. That being said, having a best friend by my side just makes everything that much better, more exciting and a lot easier. It’s not that I can’t live without him, it’s that I don’t want to.

I refuse to take our time together for granted.

It may be cliche but tomorrow is never a guarantee. He could walk away from our relationship tomorrow, I could decide I want something different or a tragedy could change one or both of our lives forever. Since we don’t know what’s going to happen, while I’m with him I want to savor every moment, even if that means we spend a lot of time together.

I’ve been with a guy who didn’t want anything to do with me.

My ex was dismissive and never made it seem like he wanted me around. I know what it’s like to be in a half-hearted relationship and this time around, I refuse to go one day without him knowing what he means to me. It feels so amazing to be with someone who is excited to spend time together and reminds me how special I am. If that means I seem clingy to someone else, so be it.

Being attentive makes me a better partner.

How many women can say they can read their guys so well that they don’t need to say anything for their girlfriends to know somethings wrong? Spending as much time as I do with my boyfriend and knowing him as well is what enables me to be there for him unlike anyone can. I know his every dream and fear, and it’s why I can support him no matter what.

I won’t put him before my other relationships.

While I value my boyfriend and what we have, being around him a lot doesn’t mean I’ve totally dismissed the other people in my life. I love nights with the girls, being with family, and doing activities that don’t involve him. At the end of the day, the fact that we have lives apart from each other just makes us stronger.

I’ll defend him ’til the ends of the earth.

Some girls think I’m clingy because I’ll back my guy up no matter what, but that’s just me showing how much I care. If he doesn’t something incredibly stupid, I’ll make sure he knows I disapprove, but outside of anything illegal, I’m in his corner. That doesn’t make me clingy, it makes me loyal.

If he asks for space, I always respect it. 

It’d be one thing if I refused to leave him alone even if he smelt smothered, but I would never make him feel like he couldn’t shoo me away. We have the kind of relationship where we don’t get sick of each other, but if for some reason he did ever want me to go home, I would be totally understanding.

There is usually a reason women judge me.

 In my experience, the gals who think I’m clingy AF are either single and jealous or taken and with guys who, like my ex, don’t seem to care if they’re around or not. Everyone else who sees and respects my relationship understands that there’s nothing wrong with us enjoying each other’s company.

I don’t care what anyone else thinks. 

There are many people in my life whose opinions I value, but the truth is, whether or not they think I’m obsessed with my guy doesn’t actually matter to me. I know who I am, I know what we have, and I know that whether or not I appear clingy it doesn’t change anything about who we are as a couple. Haters gonna hate, and I’ll be too busy loving love to notice.

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