You’re a smart woman, I know, and you’re really perceptive too. You’re the farthest thing from delusional and you probably even consider yourself a realist when it comes to love. However, if the guy you like isn’t reciprocating your energy and effort, it’s probably not that he just needs time to open up to you and more than you’re ignoring these signs he’s not into you. Sorry, but it has to be said.
He doesn’t want to hang out more than once or twice a week.
Obviously no two people can or should be together 24/7. It’s unrealistic and unhealthy and kinda weird to suggest otherwise. However, when you first start dating someone and you’re allegedly totally into each other, it’s natural to want to be in each other’s pocket all the time. If he’s limiting the time you spend together to once or twice a week and will actively refuse to get together with you any more than that, this is one of the most obvious signs he’s not into you.
He bails on your plans all the time.
Sure, stuff comes up sometimes. Work runs late, you get a cold, your car breaks down… However, if he has to raincheck more often than your plans actually go through, something’s amiss. If it’s that he doesn’t want to do the specific thing you have planned, why doesn’t he speak up and suggest something better? More likely than not, however, it’s that he isn’t all that bothered about hanging out with you.
You’re doing all the chasing.
This should never be happening! While it’s not the guy’s job to chase the woman, by any means, he should at least be putting a bit of effort in to pursue you. If he’s letting you do all the work, making contact first, planning all the days, initiating basically every element of your relationship, it’s time to read the signs: he’s just not into you.
He avoids introducing you to his friends.
His friends are his friends and that’s fine – it’s not like you’re trying to crash every single guys’ night. However, if he’s actively avoiding introducing you to his friends or outright refuses to do so, there’s something up here. A guy who plans to keep you in his life long-term will have no qualms about bringing you into the fold. If he’s not doing it, he’s not into you.
He claims he’s not the relationship type.
If he’s not the relationship type, what the hell is he doing getting into a relationship? Sure, maybe you’re just dating, but unless he came out and told you he was looking for a no-strings-attached sexual situation, he’s in the game for a reason. However, maybe he’s not the relationship type, in which case, he clearly doesn’t like you enough (or at all) to change that.
He doesn’t know much about you and he doesn’t ask.
A guy who wants to be with you is obviously going to want to get to know you. If he never asks you anything about yourself, your life, your thoughts and feelings, or anything else all that personal, it’s yet another of those major signs that he’s not into you. If he was, he would show an interest in all the things that make you tick and make you who you are.
He doesn’t care if you’re still seeing other people.
Girl, how much clearer can it get? If he liked you all that much, he would want you all to himself. He’d want to be in a committed, exclusive relationship. If he’s not really all that bothered if you’re still active on dating apps or even still seeing other people, take the hint.
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