How To Tell If He’ll Be Good In Bed Before You Sleep With Him

If you’ve just started seeing someone new, decided that you’re into him, and had a few cheeky make-out sessions, it’s natural to wonder about the next step. Perhaps you’re hoping he’ll be good in bed because everything has been perfect so far. If so, here’s how to tell that he’ll live up to all your expectations.

He’s attentiveIf he’s a very attentive person, this is likely to translate to other areas of your relationship. By attentive, I mean that he listens to you when you talk. He takes care of you by pulling out your chair at a restaurant. He notices when you’re cold when you’re both out walking and he gives you his jacket. It’s the little things, but trust me when I say that they’re about to amount to a big thing.

He tries to make you feel comfortable during conversation. Speaking of listening, he doesn’t just sit there when you talk— he also responds in a way that makes you feel like he really cares about you and your needs. From empathizing when you tell him sad stories from your past to laughing at your (not-so-funny) jokes, is he actively trying to make you feel good at every opportunity? If he’s trying so hard to make you feel this good during conversation, can you imagine how hard he’ll try to make you feel good in the bedroom?

He makes the conversation about you. Even when he’s talking or telling a story about his past, he sometimes tries to shift the focus back to you or keep you involved by asking you questions about what he’s just said. Why? Well, maybe he’s just totally obsessed with you. And when you’re obsessed with someone, you do anything you can to please them. True story.

He’s a good communicator. If he’s great at communicating both when you’re together and when you’re apart, he’s going to be great in bed. After all, good sex isn’t just about the moves. It’s about being able to communicate what you like (and what you don’t like quite as much). Openness and honesty are key!

He makes intense eye contact with you. When I look back on the guys I’ve dated, it’s the ones that seem like they’re trying to burn a hole in my soul that are the best lovers. If a guy wasn’t able to look me in the eye or looked away a lot during conversation, they were unsure and awkward in bed. Therefore, if your guy looks at you in a way that makes you feel all of the butterflies, this is a good sign.

He’s tactile. By this, I don’t mean that he’s constantly feeling you up and it’s making you feel like he’s hornier than a pubescent boy. I mean that he knows when and where to show you affection. If he doesn’t give too much away but doesn’t hold back either, this is a surefire sign that he’ll be a class-A lover.

He has a quiet confidence. Similarly, if he’s not one of these guys that makes crude sexual innuendos in (what feels like) every conversation, this bodes well. In my experience, these types of guys talk so much because they’re trying to overcompensate for what they’ve got to offer. On the other hand, if the guy you’re dating has a quiet confidence that comes across as mysterious but intriguing, you should feel incredibly excited about what’s to come.

He doesn’t push you into sex. He lets the tension build up naturally and waits for the right opportunity to make his move. Why? Well, because he’s that confident in his abilities. He knows the next step will be great and he’ll perform great once you get around to it.

He’s an amazing kisser. Lastly, one of the biggest signs that he’ll be good in bed is if he’s a ten out of ten in the make-out department. After all, if he can kiss you in a way that makes you go weak at the knees, imagine what he can do to you in the bedroom. Kissing is also a good indicator of how much experience he has. And the more experience he has, the better he’s going to be at kissing—and doing the dirty.

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