You met a great guy and things were going so well – you even told all your friends about him – but then he rejected you. You were left dizzy, wondering what happened. Ouch. There could be some things that you’re doing when you start dating guys that you don’t realize are putting them off. Sorry, but it’s better to know about them now so you don’t repeat them in the future. Ready? Here are 13 small dating mistakes that could be putting off the good guys.
1. You never shut up about how much you’ve achieved.
When getting to know a guy, do you find yourself rambling on about all the things you’ve achieved? Although you might think you’re being chatty and friendly, while showing the guy you’re awesome, it can be off-putting to him because you’re giving him TMI and coming off as braggy. No one wants to be around someone who brags.
2. You show up looking disheveled.
It’s always a good move to adjust your appearance to the date you’re going on (high heels during a picnic? Not a good idea), but try to make some effort, okay? Rocking up with untidy hair and smeared makeup from last night’s party tells a good guy you’re not making an effort ’cause he’s not worth it. And, that you don’t about yourself, which is also a turn-off.
3. You don’t appreciate the little things.
When your new BF brings you a cup of tea when you’re feeling down or offers to drive you to your best mate’s birthday party ’cause your car’s in the shop, don’t assume that this is NBD. Everyone wants to feel acknowledged and appreciated. If you’re ignoring the small acts of kindness, you’re sending a guy the message that he’s not good enough. A good guy isn’t going to stand for that, and rightly so.
4. You take way too long to reply to important texts.
Although it’s good not to be glued to your phone, if you’re playing games with the guy, you could be putting him off. So, if he texts you about your upcoming date plans and you decide to let him wait for hours or days to make him want you, you’re giving him mixed messages and making him wonder why he should be waiting. He’s not gonna wait!
5. You talk trash about your ex.
While it’s healthy to talk about previous relationships once you get to know the guy you’re dating, it comes off as toxic if you’re always slipping in some negative talk about your exes. Like, if the guy says that he’s tired of dating people who resist commitment and you say, “Story of my life with all my exes.” It starts to make it seem like you were the problem, not your exes.
6. You post too many filtered pics.
Everyone wants to look good, but if you’re only posting filtered selfies on your social media profiles, you’re giving people the impression that you’re low on confidence or trying to be something that you’re not. It’s insincere. It’s even worse if you’re filtering couple selfies – the guy wants you to be you, not some weird version of yourself.
7. You’re trying to be too cool.
Just like with trying to look our best in snaps, we all want to be cool and attractive. But, if you’re trying a little too hard to be the cool girl, like by saying “yes” to everything so you come across as fun to be around, this could backfire. Guys want partners who are their own people, not a clone of them. Boring!
8. You’re a drama magnet.
It’s great to feel like you can tell the new guy you’re dating anything, but wait! If you’re dumping on him about the latest gossip or fight you had with your frenemy, he might feel like you’re a drama magnet. No one wants to be around someone who’s always throwing stress their way.
9. You’re addicted to your phone.
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Can you go through a lunch or dinner without checking your phone? If not, you’re probably putting off dates. There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to connect with someone who’s tuned out because they’re too focused on their cell phone. It’s so rude!
10. You expect him to be psychic.
You might have certain dating expectations, and that’s fine, but expecting your partner to know what you want or what’s on your mind is a recipe for disaster. You’ll come off as a demanding diva, while he’ll be wondering why you can’t just communicate like a grown-ass woman. Yikes.
11. You’re really vain.
Forget the fear that you’re high-maintenance. That’s not what puts some guys off. Instead, they’re repelled by women who are too vain. When you’re out together and you check out your reflection in any mirrored surface you can find, he’s going to be rolling his eyes and thinking that he doesn’t want to be stuck with someone who’s superficial and self-obsessed.
12. You’re too available.
It’s easy to get caught up in the rush of dating someone new and wanting to be around them all day and night, but be careful. If you put your life on hold for your budding relationship, it tells the guy you’re waiting around for love or don’t have a life, and that can seem clingy or weird.
13. You drill him on dates.
Although you want to get to know the guy you’re dating, you shouldn’t drill him with tons of questions or ask questions in a way that makes it seem like you’re challenging their answers or being critical of them. Trust issues, anyone? Tread carefully and enjoy getting to know each other in a natural way so it doesn’t feel like a stressful experience.
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