It’s unlikely to go through the whole of your twenties without having at least one friend with benefits situation. If you do, that’s kind of an achievement. It’s even more of an achievement if you don’t end up falling for one of your FWBs. Here’s how you know you’re getting too attached.
You miss being around him when you’re not together. I’m sure when you both agreed to have this whole arrangement, you decided that you’d just meet up as and when was convenient for one thing and one thing only. That said, if you actually start to miss being around him when you’re not hooking up, then this is a sign that you might be developing some real AF feelings for him. Uh oh.
You miss talking to him when you’re not together. The concern that you might be developing the feels for him is especially true if you actually miss talking to him when you’re not together. Usually with a FWB arrangement, you text very little when you’re apart unless it’s to plan the next rendezvous. However, if you find yourself wanting to pop him a message to say hi, goodnight, or see how he’s doing, this is a surefire sign that you like him a little more than you’re letting on.
Little things remind you of him. You might be secretly wanting something more than your present situation if he pops into your mind at random times. This could be something silly like thinking of him when you see a penguin stuffed toy when you know his favorite animal is a penguin or being reminded of the time you made each other laugh with your crazy dancing when the same song you danced to comes on the radio. Either way, if you’re thinking about him more than you’re not on a daily basis, then I hate to break it to you but you’ve got it bad.
You regularly stalk him on social media. Do you often want to know what he’s up to when he’s not seeing you? Do you find yourself frequently check out his Facebook page or Snapchat story? Then I’m afraid you like him. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t go out of your way to stay in his business. You’d just get on with your life and his whereabouts wouldn’t affect you in the slightest. True story.
You talk about him a lot to your friends. If your friends are complaining that you talk about your FWB all the time or they’re worried that you’re going to get hurt, listen to them. Your friends know you better than anyone and they’ll probably be able to call out your feelings perhaps before you’ve even noticed them yourself. They’re good like that.
You start thinking about a potential future with him. One of the biggest signs that you’re falling for your FWB is that you often catch yourself daydreaming about a potential future with him. Perhaps you’ve stopped thinking of him as just a sex buddy and now you’re looking at him in a different light? Maybe you’ve even decided that you want him to take you out instead of just going to each other’s condos all the time. Either way, if you start to see a future with him, this means you care about him more than you initially thought. Cute.
You get jealous when he spends time with other girls. Ah, jealousy… It tends to creep up on us and show us how we’re really feeling, even if we’re not expecting it—am I right? If your FWB is pretty open with you about dating other girls or you’ve seen that he’s been spending time with someone else through his social media and you don’t like it, ask yourself why. After all, there must be a reason why you’re feeling so possessive over him.
You want to see him more regularly. If you had a once-a-week type of arrangement with your FWB and you suddenly find that you want to change that to three times a week—or, heck, once a day—because you miss him when you’re not together, then this is a big indicator that you’re falling for him faster than rain falls from the sky. After all, we all get horny, but not so horny that we can’t go without it for a good few days.
You’re not interested in getting to know other guys. Finally, if your FWB is the only guy you’ve got your eye on right now and you feel like every other guy in the world can go do one, then this is a strong sign that you’re only here for your FWB and no one else. Whenever there’s an opportunity to hang out with someone else who might be interested in you, you decline. Why? Well, you’re holding out for your FWB, of course. Let’s just hope he’s holding out for you too.
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